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~ J Clay Norton, Ed.D.

The Book Chamber

Category Archives: Actions

Square Peg, Round Hole Leadership

10 Thursday Jan 2019

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Authentic, Character, Consistency, Decisions, Facade, Importance, Integrity, Leader, Leadership, Purpose, Relationships, Servant

≈ 2 Comments

“I can make it fit. No, you can’t, it is not going to work. You know it, and I know it. Fine, I’ll show you. Go ahead then, you will figure it out.” Moments later, “Why will this not fit?”

A square peg in a round hole… the classic idiom.

images-8

We have all seen the pre-school hands-on learning tool, and we have seen children trying to figure it out. Never ceasing to be amazed at the comedy that it provides.

Oh, but how many leadership truths can be found in something so trivial?

Now, fast-forward to adults in leadership settings who are trying to do the same thing. Have you ever asked that question of, “How did that person get that leadership position?” The comedy increases, but it is not the same kind of harmless fun. It takes on a whole new level that could have a negative effect on many.

Bottom line, truth to be considered, is the fact that some people have leadership positions because of who they know instead of what they know. Yes, believe it or not, wrong people can be in leadership positions. Why and how, are questions that probably do not want to be answered. It happens, and we see it every day. Our society is running rampant with it in every area imaginable where leadership is involved.

While the outer appearance looks great, square peg, round hole leaders really do not contribute to the growth and development of others. Motivation is done through fear, and the assertion of their leadership only happens when mistakes are made, thus creating rejection.

Square peg, round hole leaders sell a facade of leadership that it can work and the main issue is that many “trick” themselves into thinking that it actually can, knowing all along that the square peg is not fitting in that round hole.

So, what to do? I have more questions than I have answers for this blog post, but I do know that time has a way of revealing everything for what it is worth. The one constant I believe that will always work is to be for others and the greater good and not your own self-interests.

©2019 J Clay Norton

Remember… THINK LEADERSHIP!

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Is Your Leadership A Gift?

14 Friday Dec 2018

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Choice, Gift, Giving, Heart, Importance, Integrity, Leader, Leadership, Present, Purpose, Relationships, Servant, Transactional, Transformational, Value

≈ 2 Comments

It’s the season of giving…

First, a disclaimer… This is about intentional giving and not about giving out of obligation (I have never been a fan of that anyway).

Have you ever considered the mental taxation and stress that goes on our hearts and minds of buying a present? Often, there are serious calculations that take place, causing the Advil bottle to empty quickly. The heavy sighs of not knowing what to give, the internet searches, the pages of the catalogs turning, asking others what they think, looking for the one present that says as much about you as it does the person you are buying for.

When we buy a present for someone, it is nothing more than a transaction.  Hardly any feelings take place between the seller and the buyer.  There is probably a friendly, polite conversation but no emotional feelings are exchanged. Why? Because when we make a purchase, a relationship is not established. Just another heavy sigh takes place, but this time one of relief, knowing that you have completed the task.

Gifting_2-sized

But…
Once you give that present to someone, it becomes a gift — everything changes; you take on a different mindset — the anticipation in hoping that everything you went through to make that “transaction” was worth it. Relationships are established when we give the present. The present becomes a gift because when we give it, we are expressing to that person you value them and you want them to be a part of your family or a part of your inner circle.

For some of the gifts we give, a lot of thought process goes into it.  We really try hard to find that perfect gift for others.  Why is this? Intentionality! I believe when we give gifts, it says something about what is inside of us and the relationship that we have with the recipients.  As I think about it a little more now, everything we give shows what is inside of us.  Our time, money, thoughts, etc.; even our leadership.

What then can be said of our leadership as we give it to others?  Is it intentional or out of obligation? Is your leadership nothing more than a present of a transaction? Does it matter what we give in regards to leadership?  I believe so.  Let’s make sure that it does. Turn your leadership into a gift for others. Let it transform not only you but them also.

©2018 J Clay Norton

Remember… THINK LEADERSHIP!

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“Masked” Leadership

07 Friday Dec 2018

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Attitude, Authentic, Character, Consistency, Expectations, Facade, Honest, Integrity, Leader, Leadership, Mask, Transparent, Trust

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This past summer when we visited Los Angeles, my daughter and I decided to take a tour of the Warner Brothers Studio.  One of the areas of the tour was the “Streets and Buildings” section. This section of the tour took us up and down streets on the grounds of the studio with buildings that were “sets” for many of our favorite TV shows.

While I knew each building was just a “prop,” seeing it up close reinforced my notion of the great facade within TV shows.  You might be saying, “Duh, really?  You did not know that?”  Well, yes I did, but to see it up close makes you realize just how real, “fake” can be.

The same can be said with leadership.  Often, leadership is nothing more than a facade, providing a face that appears to have it all together.  As we continue to live our lives in leadership positions, and the more mature we grow in that, we should begin to see how many fake, masked leaders are in roles that end up causing more harm than good.

How can we tell the difference? How do we see beyond the facade that “fakes everyone out?” What is really “behind the scenes?”  To answer these questions, we must look at the actions, and then hear the words to see if they connect.

images-6

I believe leaders who wear a mask do the following…

Fail to speak the truth

Masked leaders swallow the truth.  They speak what they think is best to cover themselves.  When this happens, they also swallow their integrity, self-respect, and most of all their authenticity.

Want to be “blenders”

Masked leaders want to be whatever they think they need to be for whatever environment they are in. They change their leadership style to accommodate and blend into every new crowd.

Find it hard to apologize

Masked leaders find it very hard to apologize. Either they do not, or they deflect with, “I’m sorry you feel that way.”

Are “copycats”

Masked leaders who “copycat” other leaders cannot be themselves. I believe this is one of the more dangerous characteristics of leadership. People want a real leader.

Promote their “perfectionism”

Masked leaders cannot handle situations where no one agrees with them. It causes them to feel rejected. Believing that your leadership is perfect actually stems from the fear of knowing that it is not.

Shine their “light” too bright

Masked leaders never dim their light. They always want to be seen as the brightest in the room. Having their light the brightest automatically dims anyone else’s light that actually could shine brightly.

When you wear a mask, you rob not only yourself of what you could be, but you rob others of their ability to be who they are around you. If you are wearing a mask, please lose it.  Halloween should only come one time a year, and life is not an everyday masquerade ball.

©2018 J Clay Norton

Remember… THINK LEADERSHIP!

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Do Others “DIG” Your Leadership?

09 Friday Nov 2018

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Attitude, Authentic, Character, Consistency, Decisions, Expectations, Humility, Inspiration, Integrity, Leader, Leadership, Purpose, Sacrifice, Servant, Understanding, Value

≈ 1 Comment

Leaders who are most successful have the openness to allow empowerment. Leaders who “take care of” their people will build a trust earned of the heart and not just the mind. Leaders who give of themselves first, invite the cooperation of others to work alongside “with” not “for” a common goal. What is this common goal; to make leadership about others and not yourself.

It is tough to do this in a society that places so much emphasis and importance on the “me first.” It goes against every fiber of our bodies to “let go” and begin to think of a different way to lead. At some point a leader must ask themselves, do I have the respect of others? Leaders who are for their people do not have to ask this. If you have to ask, then you probably do not. It is straightforward to tell because you are the one who determines the respect.

After pondering my thoughts above, I believe there are three ways to determine where you are with your leadership with others and where others are with your leadership. Yes, it goes both ways.

drainage-ditch

Do what you say, say what you do…

You are the example, the poster-face of your organization. You must understand the responsibility that comes with being the leader. Everything, everything you do provides some level of engagement that others will feed off of, either good or bad. This is the responsibility you have as a leader. Great leaders understand this. Great leaders know that they are putting their lives in with the lives of others for the greater wellbeing of the organization, not just themselves.

Get the shovel and help dig the ditch…

I have always been a fan of the line, “Do not ask someone to do something you are not willing to do yourself.” What I do not like to hear or see in leadership is the idea of, “I have paid my dues, I don’t have to do that anymore.” Yes, dues are paid; everyone understands that, and some can even respect that. But what is not ok, is for you to flaunt yourself and not be willing to do any of the work. If you want your people to be inspired, do not only get in the ditch but get a shovel and dig. People want to see leadership in the ditch with them. To understand and feel as they do; not every blue moon, but on a consistent basis. Having a clean shovel is not a good sign of leadership.

Responsibility is yours; credit is theirs…

Leadership must own its actions and decisions. It is so easy to place blame on others; we see it all the time. This is where that ego of many gets in the way. I have witnessed many times where a leader will “paint themselves in a corner” only to let someone else take the fall; the idea of being “called on the carpet” per se. But, to look at the opposite… when something great happens, the leader wants to be front and center, forgetting the ones behind. I am sorry to say this, but once again, it is about the people, not you. Be willing to acknowledge and reward the opportunities that can make a difference for the people. Let the light shine on them. Better yet, just be the shadow. Give credit where it is due, to the ones, you work “with.”

Great leaders should understand the impact they have. As the leader, you are being watched and more than likely, being talked about. Is it good or bad? It is so important that you, the leader, model what you want in your team, because what you model will be modeled.

Remember… THINK LEADERSHIP!

©2018 J Clay Norton

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