Category Archives: Relationships

Encouragement… Have You Used It Lately?

08 Friday Feb 2019

Posted by in Actions, Encouragement, Leader, Leadership, Relationships, Teachers, Transformational, Value, Word

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Staying on the educational side of leadership this week let’s touch on the idea of encouragement, and how teachers and leaders* can enhance this characteristic.

*Again, while discussing this idea, you can at any time switch out the words teaching and leading/leadership.

Encouragement

One of the most useful tools a teacher can have is being an encourager. In today’s culture, many things cause students to be cast down, and it is very easy for them to be and become discouraged. They put up a “front,” not wanting anyone to recognize help is needed. They believe they are self-reliant, saying, “I can get through this,” all along knowing they need help. A majority of the time, that help can be nothing more than simple encouragement. You can tell when students are encouraged. They have a new spring in their step and a broader smile on their face.

We have all, at one time or another, needed encouragement. Why? Because we have all had experiences when someone or something failed us. It is at that time encouragement was needed most; wanting to be understood and have someone stand for and with us. None of us can know what lies ahead. For the most part, we do not know what is going  on in the lives of our students. Until we are intentional with our relationships, any words of encouragement become shallow and unfelt. Lip service is never good in leadership.

I have found the best way to encourage students, especially in the classroom, is to just acknowledge their existence in an adult, professional manner. A “hello” with their name at the door, a fist pump, or an elbow tap eases the slightest apprehension a student might have. When you make it where the student understands that you are there for help, it changes their whole thought process. What does not work is saying, “If you need some help, let me know.” Without intentionality, this sounds like a blanket statement, quickly said, so it goes on record.

We must also realize that words of encouragement do not immediately make troubles disappear. However, what words of encouragement do is acknowledge someone needs help. Encouraging words can help a person not live in a room of emptiness. Often, students feel deserted, only painting a picture of loneliness because they do not understand something or feel devalued.

As we continue to educate, make sure you are for your students, and that means, when needed, truly encouraging them. You might be the only one who does.

©2019 J Clay Norton

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Is your teaching and leading built on a foundation of excellence?

01 Friday Feb 2019

Posted by in Actions, Choice, Consistency, Deciding, Effective, Essence, Expectations, Foundation, Leader, Leadership, Purpose, Relationships, Servant, Teachers

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For this week’s blog, I am going off the road of general leadership but staying on the leadership map. Today, I would like to take a small side trip and talk about the educational leadership side of teaching.

Let’s start with this quote from Epictetus (Roman Teacher/Philosopher, 55-135, AD)…

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Foundation of Excellence: “Tentative efforts lead to tentative outcomes. Therefore give yourself fully to your endeavors. Decide to consult your character through excellent actions and determine to pay the price of a worthy goal. The trials you encounter will introduce you to your strengths. Remain steadfast – and one day you will build something that endures: something worthy of your potential.”

 

I believe the question that can be asked of the quote is, “What are the foundations of our teaching/leadership* building?” I have a few thoughts…

*While discussing this idea, you can at any time switch out the words teaching and leading/leadership, because I think both, in essence, are the same.

To build anything, we must know the personalities of all involved. What are the personalities of those we teach? What makes them tick? When we understand who we are teaching first, our teaching becomes much more effective; understanding that leading is not about us but others. Learn who your people are.

We must also be consistent with our teaching. I have never seen a foundation made for a structure that is not consistent. Inconsistent foundations will not hold up and support what is being built. It reflects the “tentative efforts” part of the quote… for we will obtain “tentative outcomes.” Overall, one of the main problems teachers have is not being consistent with their day-to-day methods; how they teach, how they manage.

Your foundation is your foundation. No one else can build it for you. Now, there are some great teachers who are very deserving to model, and it does us well to emulate some of their teaching characteristics, if and only if those characteristics can work for you. However, a common mistake of many teachers, young and experienced, is always copying and not being yourself. Be you and adapt and adjust depending on the environment. The worse thing you can do is be hard-headed. “My way or the highway” is not good teaching or leadership.

Great teachers are willing to try new approaches. The worst six words with regards to any leadership are, “We have always done it this way.” Just because the “manual” says this is the way to do it, does not make it the only way. As teachers, we have to find what works and connects to our audience. Only when both are established can we bring our efforts “fully to our endeavors.”

Lastly, I believe great teachers are willing and want to keep learning. There is nothing more disappointing than seeing a teacher who is either contented or disheartened. Go back to the “tentative efforts” part of the quote. Experience does matter, but not to the extent of believing you know it all. We can always learn something new.

Great leaders are aware of not only who they are but also who everyone else is and the environment surrounding them. This is an ongoing process that is rooted in servant-leadership. Start today building that foundation of excellence.  Be that person and when you are, referring to the quote, “one day you will build something that endures: something worthy of your potential.”

©2019 J Clay Norton

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Square Peg, Round Hole Leadership

10 Thursday Jan 2019

Posted by in Actions, Authentic, Character, Consistency, Decisions, Facade, Importance, Integrity, Leader, Leadership, Purpose, Relationships, Servant

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“I can make it fit. No, you can’t, it is not going to work. You know it, and I know it. Fine, I’ll show you. Go ahead then, you will figure it out.” Moments later, “Why will this not fit?”

A square peg in a round hole… the classic idiom.

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We have all seen the pre-school hands-on learning tool, and we have seen children trying to figure it out. Never ceasing to be amazed at the comedy that it provides.

Oh, but how many leadership truths can be found in something so trivial?

Now, fast-forward to adults in leadership settings who are trying to do the same thing. Have you ever asked that question of, “How did that person get that leadership position?” The comedy increases, but it is not the same kind of harmless fun. It takes on a whole new level that could have a negative effect on many.

Bottom line, truth to be considered, is the fact that some people have leadership positions because of who they know instead of what they know. Yes, believe it or not, wrong people can be in leadership positions. Why and how, are questions that probably do not want to be answered. It happens, and we see it every day. Our society is running rampant with it in every area imaginable where leadership is involved.

While the outer appearance looks great, square peg, round hole leaders really do not contribute to the growth and development of others. Motivation is done through fear, and the assertion of their leadership only happens when mistakes are made, thus creating rejection.

Square peg, round hole leaders sell a facade of leadership that it can work and the main issue is that many “trick” themselves into thinking that it actually can, knowing all along that the square peg is not fitting in that round hole.

So, what to do? I have more questions than I have answers for this blog post, but I do know that time has a way of revealing everything for what it is worth. The one constant I believe that will always work is to be for others and the greater good and not your own self-interests.

©2019 J Clay Norton

Remember… THINK LEADERSHIP!

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Is Your Leadership A Gift?

14 Friday Dec 2018

Posted by in Actions, Choice, Gift, Giving, Heart, Importance, Integrity, Leader, Leadership, Present, Purpose, Relationships, Servant, Transactional, Transformational, Value

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It’s the season of giving…

First, a disclaimer… This is about intentional giving and not about giving out of obligation (I have never been a fan of that anyway).

Have you ever considered the mental taxation and stress that goes on our hearts and minds of buying a present? Often, there are serious calculations that take place, causing the Advil bottle to empty quickly. The heavy sighs of not knowing what to give, the internet searches, the pages of the catalogs turning, asking others what they think, looking for the one present that says as much about you as it does the person you are buying for.

When we buy a present for someone, it is nothing more than a transaction.  Hardly any feelings take place between the seller and the buyer.  There is probably a friendly, polite conversation but no emotional feelings are exchanged. Why? Because when we make a purchase, a relationship is not established. Just another heavy sigh takes place, but this time one of relief, knowing that you have completed the task.

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But…
Once you give that present to someone, it becomes a gift — everything changes; you take on a different mindset — the anticipation in hoping that everything you went through to make that “transaction” was worth it. Relationships are established when we give the present. The present becomes a gift because when we give it, we are expressing to that person you value them and you want them to be a part of your family or a part of your inner circle.

For some of the gifts we give, a lot of thought process goes into it.  We really try hard to find that perfect gift for others.  Why is this? Intentionality! I believe when we give gifts, it says something about what is inside of us and the relationship that we have with the recipients.  As I think about it a little more now, everything we give shows what is inside of us.  Our time, money, thoughts, etc.; even our leadership.

What then can be said of our leadership as we give it to others?  Is it intentional or out of obligation? Is your leadership nothing more than a present of a transaction? Does it matter what we give in regards to leadership?  I believe so.  Let’s make sure that it does. Turn your leadership into a gift for others. Let it transform not only you but them also.

©2018 J Clay Norton

Remember… THINK LEADERSHIP!

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