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~ J Clay Norton, Ed.D.

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Category Archives: Friendship

Is There a Lost Camaraderie of Teaching?

19 Friday Aug 2022

Posted by The Book Chamber in Camaraderie, Family, Friendship, Listening, Relationships, Sincerity, Teachers, Thankful, Time, Trust

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In writing last week, I mentioned I attended the memorial of one of my mentors, Dr. Gerald Hasselman. During the memorial, I looked around and realized I was sitting in an ocean of educational greatness. More importantly, I realized that these people’s friendship and camaraderie have stayed and tested time. 

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Riding home, I thought about my teacher friendships that have also moved with time. Yes, these core friends will drop anything to help. I also realized that teacher friendships and relationships are becoming a “thing of the past.” I remember early on in teaching, at the end of the day, we would “hang around and visit” for a little while. Slower days, they were, I guess. 

I asked one of them the other day, “Reckon why?” As we talked, we came up with several ideas. 

Teachers…

Did not move schools as much as they do today.

Lived in the community of the school.

Went to the same church.

Children were the same age.

… and a few more I’m sure you can come up with.

More than anything else, we decided that our lives did not have the hustle and bustle they do today. There are so many “things” we are involved in with ourselves or with our families. What’s an average day going home…? Get to the bank or the cleaners before they close, run by the grocery store to pick up something for supper, get children to practice for whatever sport they are in, check/go over your children’s homework, etc. And… the best school taboos… An hour and a half faculty meeting, get home to get tomorrow’s lesson ready, grade papers, etc… Before you know it, it’s time to shower and go to bed (and don’t forget to ask how your spouse’s day went).

Now, I want to get home as quickly as anyone, but… we are losing one of our greatest educational strengths – each other. Who better understands us than other teachers? At the end of the school day, the bell rings, and we hear, “See you tomorrow.” Social media and texting have taken the place of conversations that includes the going on’s of your family, not the smack talk of gossip. Having another teacher listen and ask questions, connect mentally, provide realness, offer help, and celebrate is the camaraderie we are missing.

As the school year begins, make an effort to have camaraderie with your colleagues. There will be some you do not “click” with, and that’s ok. However, you will appreciate the social and emotional side of your well-being when you do find those with whom you do “click,” and your friendship stays intentional. 

Two more thoughts for this blog stand out as we close…

  1. For the Andy Griffith fans out there, the episode of “What’s Your Hurry” comes to mind. 
  2. For the “Toy Story” fans, with Andy and Buzz… “You’ve Got a Friend in Me.”

Both of these practiced intentionally, can be of great help.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2022 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts? Follow me on… Twitter @thebookchamber or follow the blog directly.

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The Value of a Mentor and a Tribute to Dr. Gerald Hasselman…

10 Wednesday Aug 2022

Posted by The Book Chamber in Appreciation, Education, Educational Leadership, Friendship, Heroes, Influence, Inspiration, Leader, Leadership, Legacy, Relationships, Thankful, Value

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The opening week of school for many of us… Let’s talk about the value of mentors and influence, along with a tribute. Regardless of age, we all need them. I made a list the other night and wrote down fourteen names of people who have influenced and mentored me outside my family. I have been very fortunate to have such people in my life. I would also like to add that along with Dr. Hasselman, who recently passed away, two others also have. Of the fourteen remaining, some go way back to high school, college, the beginning of my career, and also currently; all at some time or another in the areas of coaching, teaching, and leadership. While some of the fourteen are recent over the past few years on my list, I will say that along with the others, the mentor and influence team that I have has rock star status. Each one, mentoring and influencing in different areas completing the whole.

I met G (Dr. Hasselman) in 2006 when I started my specialist degree at Mississippi College. I had spoken with him on the phone a few days before about the program, and G told me to stop by. I stopped a few days later and went to his office on the second floor of Lowery Hall. He was not in there, so I walked down the hall. I saw Dr. Tom Williams in the conference room and spoke to him. I did not know Dr. Hasselman was in the room also… I asked Dr. Williams if he knew where I could find Dr. Hasselman. The next voice I heard was, “That’s me, son.” I replied, “Dr. Hasselman, I’m Clay Norton.” Dr. Hasselman’s next words were, “I know who you are, son; go sit in my office, and I’ll be down there in a few minutes.” And that was my introduction to Dr. Gerald Hasselman in 2006.

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Throughout my specialist program and doctorate, I do not know what I did to befriend Dr. Hassleman beyond the student-professor relationship. I do not understand why he took an interest in me. I did not know, at the time, how much of a mentor he would become and how much of his influence I would develop into my leadership style. Looking back, I still do not know, but I am and will forever be thankful. Even as an adult, 34 years old in 2006 and 16 years later, I value the influence and mentoring Dr. Hasselman provided me.

One special moment for me was that Dr. Hasselman was the keynote speaker during our doctoral commencement ceremony at MC. His speech was actually about the power of influence. In the speech, Dr. Hasselman made this comment, “If you ever see a turtle sitting on a fence post, know that it did not get up there on its own.” I realize it is a well-known thought, but for me to hear him say it took on a whole new level of worth. I realized that in many instances, I was the turtle. Along with Dr. Hasselman and others who have influenced and mentored my life, I can sit on that fence post.

Since G’s passing on July 30, a few weeks ago, memories of our relationship have flooded my mind and heart. Memories that I have teared up on and laughed out loud. One day we were playing golf together, and I called him Dr. Hasselman (I had already graduated, and that is what I still called him). He looked at me and said, “Clay, we are colleagues now; G will work just fine.” It took me awhile…

So, here is my tribute to G…

I’m writing today, to tell of a person who modeled leadership to its finest degree. Dr. Gerald Hasselman passed away on July 30, 2022. I only knew G as a college professor at Mississippi College and as a friend for a total of 16 years. Looking at his resume would make you dizzy with all he had done in education, almost every possible role. I would like to tell you about Dr. Hasselman as one of my mentors and his influence on my life. On this front, I can say, without a doubt, that he is one of the best I have ever seen. In and outside of the classroom, he treated everyone with the same high expectations and values. His heart for education transcends into many lives he touched. As an educator, he valued education and serving others, and he did just that. You never had to guess where you stood with G; it was evident. Affording everyone he interacted with, with brutal honesty, respect to difference of opinions, open to dialogue, and fairness; precious and rare characteristics of leaders today. As a lifelong educator, G helped the future by influencing so many, which we need to remember to do and value as well. Education needs more educators like Gerald Hasselman because people like Gerald Hasselman are extraordinary educational leaders. Sitting in his classroom was like being in an educational think-tank with him.

So, I am sad that I lost someone I adored, admired, respected, appreciated, loved, etc. However, I can also be glad knowing that I believe I am a better educational leader because of him. Personally, I will miss G’s subtle wit and small talk about golf and the St. Louis Cardinals. G also became our family’s travel agent/guide; he had traveled almost everywhere and always knew of a good place to eat. Many a conversation we had and solved most of life’s problems. I am grateful for the time I have had being his student and colleague, as I am sure many of you are as well who had him as a professor and worked with him. His impact on our lives leaves a legacy that will ripple through education for years to come. Dr. Gerald Hasselman was my professor, my colleague, an inspiration, one of my leadership heroes and my mentor. Most importantly, G was my friend, and I will miss him…

I hope you have a mentor in your life like the ones I have had and currently do. It will make you better, regardless of your age. Allow someone to invest in you so you can invest in others. The value of a mentor is needed in all areas of life, including education.

I hope everyone has a great school year.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2022 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts? Follow me on… Twitter @thebookchamber or follow the blog directly.

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A Tribute for Teacher Appreciation… Mina Darnell

06 Friday May 2022

Posted by The Book Chamber in Education, Friendship, Leadership, Legacy, Relationships, Teacher Appreciation, Teachers, Value

≈ 2 Comments

Many times in life, you can tell someone specifically how you feel. But to allow others to see and read your feelings, maybe not so much. So, for Teacher Appreciation Week, a tribute…

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I’m writing today, possibly for many of us, in our different ways, to say goodbye to Mina Darnell, who is retiring after 33.5 years of teaching, all at Clinton. I’m not here to talk about her as a leader, or a math teacher, or a long-time coach, or the sponsor of National Honor Society, or the many other things she did or does presently. Today, I’m talking about Mina Darnell as an educator. On this front, I can say, without a doubt, that she is one of the best I have ever seen. In and outside of the classroom, she treated everyone with the same high expectations and value. As an educator, her place was to educate, and she did just that, evident that you knew exactly where you stood. Affording everyone she interacted with, with honesty, respect, and fairness; precious and rare characteristics. As educators, as those who teach the future, it’s something that we need to remember to value. Education needs more educators like Mina Darnell because people like Mina Darnell are extraordinary educators. So, it can be sad that we are losing someone we adore, admire, respect, appreciate, etc. However, we can also be glad that she starts a new chapter and enjoys retirement. Personally, I will miss Mina’s subtle wit and common thinking ground across the hallway. Many a talk we have had and solved most of life’s problems. I am also grateful for the time I have had being an educator with her, as I am sure many of you are as well, and for the impact she has had on students’ lives and on all our lives, for that matter. A legacy she leaves. Mina Darnell is my teaching colleague, in many ways a mentor and a confidant. Most importantly, Mina Darnell is my friend, and I will miss her.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2022 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts? Follow me on… Twitter @thebookchamber or follow the blog directly.

Want to share this leadership thought with others? Click on one of the social media sharing buttons below and help spread the good…

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24/7, 365 – Christmas All The Time… Why Not?

13 Monday Dec 2021

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Christmas, Consistency, Emotion, Engagement, Essence, Family, Friendship, Gift, Giving, Grace, Gratitude, Intentional, Kindness, Relationships, Servant, Sincerity

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Here’s the “thing” I have noticed about me… The older I get, the more I pay attention to the lyrics of songs. Don’t read this and ask yourself, “Seriously?” Anyway… yes. I don’t know why, but I do. So, the other night, driving home, Christmas Time by Bryan Adams came on the radio, and for some reason, the words took on a different meaning… Look at the lyrics throughout the song…

We waited all through the year
For the day to appear
When we could be together in harmony

You know the time will come
Peace on earth for everyone
And we can live forver in a world where we are free
Let it shine for you and me

There’s something about Christmas time
Something about Christmas time
Makes you wish it was Christmas every day
To see the joy in the children’s eyes
The way that the old folks smile
Says that Christmas will never go away

We’re all as one tonight
Makes no difference if you’re black or white
‘Cause we can sing together in harmony
I know it’s not too late
The world would be a better place
If we could keep the spirit more than one day in the year
Send a message loud and clear

It’s the time of year everyone’s together
And celebrate here on Christmas day
When the ones you love are there
You can feel the magic in the air, you know it’s everywhere

There’s something about Christmas time
Please tell me Christmas will never go away

The month of November, with Thanksgiving, and the month of December, with Christmas, has a way of stirring emotions that just maybe, are not.. let’s say “used” during the other months. Why?

Take one more example… below is a speech in The Honeymooners by Ralph Kramden, played by Jackie Gleason, speaking to his wife Alice, played by Audrey Meadows, (Yes, we watch The Honeymooners at our house.) To watch, click here: Ralph Kramden’s Christmas Speech

“You know something, sweetheart? Christmas is… well, it’s about the best time of the whole year. When you walk down the streets, even for weeks before Christmas comes, and there’s lights hanging up, green ones and red ones, sometimes there’s snow and everyone’s hustling someplace. But they don’t hustle around Christmas time like they usually do. You know, they’re a little more friendlier… they bump into you, they laugh, and they say, “Pardon me. Merry Christmas,”… especially when it gets real close to Christmas night. Everybody’s walking home; you can hardly hear a sound. Bells are ringin’, kids are singing, the snow is coming down. And boy, what a pleasure it is to think that you’ve got someplace to go to. And that the place that you’re going to, there’s somebody in it that you really love. Someone, you’re nuts about. Merry Christmas.”

I get it; Christmas is one day out of the year. But, what if… we made our hearts live as if it were Christmas all the other days? I get it; feelings (those that are positive and good) are different at Christmas. But what if… our hearts wrapped up those feelings and carried them January – November? I get it; … you can fill in the rest with your own thoughts.

As we move into the middle of December and closer to Christmas day, the more thoughts, feelings, emotions are stirred because it is Christmas time; it might be just because I am getting older. Nonetheless, we would all be better if we celebrated Christmas joy all through the year. In the end, I guess it can boil down to what I have always said, “Just do right by people.”

Live life as if it were Christmas everyday, why not? Merry Christmas everyone. This coming Friday will be the last blog of 2021 and it will be my 2021 Christmas Thoughts Poem…

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2021 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts? Follow me on… Twitter @thebookchamber or following the blog directly.

Want to share this leadership thought with others? Click on one of the social media sharing buttons below and help spread the good…

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