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~ J Clay Norton, Ed.D.

The Book Chamber

Category Archives: Mask

Genuine kindness – Where did it go?

29 Friday Jan 2021

Posted by The Book Chamber in Appreciation, Conversations, Culture, Decisions, Kindness, Leader, Leadership, Mask, Message, Relationships, Value

≈ 6 Comments

Today’s world comes at us every morning with the dog-eat-dog mentality. I have to get what is mine. Yes, I will speak to you or nod your way, but to genuinely acknowledge where the other person felt kindness… not so much. Why? Where did society take a wrong turn, and genuine kindness got left behind.

A few thoughts before I get into my other thoughts…
One, I believe technology has really hurt society in this area. Yes, there are many good, quality aspects of technology… but ultimately, what I see has happened is people are now able to hide behind their keyboards and type what they wish they could say but are afraid of the ramifications. It is almost as if the keyboard is the mask of insecurity they wear.

Ok… enough. Get to the kindness…
I heard Billy Joel’s song the other day, “We Didn’t Start the Fire,” and there is one line in the song… “I can’t take it anymore.” Well, that is often how I feel. We cannot escape… The radio, the TV, the social media, the complainers, the _________.

Ok… the kindness…
Why can’t we just be kind? It might take some effort, but it beats not being kind. Where has that ever gotten anyone?

Kindness is never arrogant. Kindness is humility. Knowing no one is really any better. Find what works for individuals and build a relationship. Quit the “me!” Try having a true interest in others. Not what you can get from them, but what they can give. That’s genuine kindness.

Say thank you that shows value… yes, appreciation. We are so worried that we are not going to get the recognition we deserve. Who cares besides you? One day, someone is going to throw that plaque in the garbage anyway. Genuine kindness celebrates others and fosters success for them.

It does not take long to figure out when kindness is not in the air. It just doesn’t smell right. You know that smell… the smell of “stuff-upedness.”
It is very hard to have a connection with others when that odor is around. As soon as they walk in the door, they say, “You smell something?”

I truly believe genuine kindness helps people motivate themselves. And when that happens, empowerment is felt and seen. Trust and respect take on new definitions, and results are an after product instead of a grind.

Quick question… You want to know if your kindness is genuine? Quick answer with a question… Are others inspired because of you?

In the end, kindness puts others first. I’m talking about leadership here… Your leadership message is for others, not you. Genuine kindness has the ability to relate to others—more about them, less about you.

Genuine kindness – where did it go? It really never left. Maybe we just forgot it was there. Genuine kindness is good for you and good for others.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2021 J Clay Norton

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It’s the most wonderful time of the year?

11 Friday Dec 2020

Posted by The Book Chamber in Choice, Christmas, COVID-19, Intentions, Jesus, Mask, Opportunity, Reflection, Thankful

≈ 3 Comments

Well, now that you have read the title, the song may be stuck in your head. Sorry about that.

Is it? The most wonderful time of the year? But it’s 2020, you ask… what’s wonderful about it?

How about this line in the opening verse…
And everyone telling you be of good cheer. Bah Humbug, for sure! I don’t want to be happy. I just watched the news, for goodness sake.

Second verse…
When friends come to call. No one is coming to see you, we all have to stay home.
It’s the hap-happiest season of all. Where’s the Tylenol? (credit to Clark Griswald)

Third verse…
There’ll be parties for hosting. Limit the number!

Fourth verse…
There’ll be much mistltoeing. Hard to do with the mask on.
And hearts will be glowing. More like aching.
When loved ones are near. Remember to stay 6′ away.

Well, I’ll say that there is much truth to what I have written above, and it is where we are right now. But, “as for me and my house…” Yes, it is still the most wonderful time of the year. I love Christmas time. It may not be what and how we want it, and yes, I am tired of it all, to say the least. However, it is up to me and my mindset to “be of good cheer.” Why would we not? It sure beats having a pity party (truly should limit that number of people anyway, and everyone who joins is probably wearing a “mask”).

So, be of good cheer…

  • Tell someone Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.
  • Send a Christmas card or note to someone (I guess a text will work).
  • “Say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet.“
  • Sing Christmas songs.
  • Watch movies as a family.
  • Play good ole fashion board games.
  • Have a party with your family. They should be the ones you love and want to spend time with the most anyway.
  • Kiss your spouse even if there is not any mistletoe around.
  • Read the Christmas Story from the Bible (Luke 2: 1-21; Isaiah 9:2, 6-7; Matthew 1: 18-23)

Most of all, yes, it is the most wonderful time of the year… Why? For it is the season we celebrate the birth of Christ. Any opportunity we have to tell the praiseworthiness of Jesus and the Christmas Story, we should take advantage of. You might not realize who is listening. That will give you good cheer!

MEERY CHRISTMAS everyone…

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2020 J Clay Norton

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“Masked” Leadership

07 Friday Dec 2018

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Attitude, Authentic, Character, Consistency, Expectations, Facade, Honest, Integrity, Leader, Leadership, Mask, Transparent, Trust

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This past summer when we visited Los Angeles, my daughter and I decided to take a tour of the Warner Brothers Studio.  One of the areas of the tour was the “Streets and Buildings” section. This section of the tour took us up and down streets on the grounds of the studio with buildings that were “sets” for many of our favorite TV shows.

While I knew each building was just a “prop,” seeing it up close reinforced my notion of the great facade within TV shows.  You might be saying, “Duh, really?  You did not know that?”  Well, yes I did, but to see it up close makes you realize just how real, “fake” can be.

The same can be said with leadership.  Often, leadership is nothing more than a facade, providing a face that appears to have it all together.  As we continue to live our lives in leadership positions, and the more mature we grow in that, we should begin to see how many fake, masked leaders are in roles that end up causing more harm than good.

How can we tell the difference? How do we see beyond the facade that “fakes everyone out?” What is really “behind the scenes?”  To answer these questions, we must look at the actions, and then hear the words to see if they connect.

images-6

I believe leaders who wear a mask do the following…

Fail to speak the truth

Masked leaders swallow the truth.  They speak what they think is best to cover themselves.  When this happens, they also swallow their integrity, self-respect, and most of all their authenticity.

Want to be “blenders”

Masked leaders want to be whatever they think they need to be for whatever environment they are in. They change their leadership style to accommodate and blend into every new crowd.

Find it hard to apologize

Masked leaders find it very hard to apologize. Either they do not, or they deflect with, “I’m sorry you feel that way.”

Are “copycats”

Masked leaders who “copycat” other leaders cannot be themselves. I believe this is one of the more dangerous characteristics of leadership. People want a real leader.

Promote their “perfectionism”

Masked leaders cannot handle situations where no one agrees with them. It causes them to feel rejected. Believing that your leadership is perfect actually stems from the fear of knowing that it is not.

Shine their “light” too bright

Masked leaders never dim their light. They always want to be seen as the brightest in the room. Having their light the brightest automatically dims anyone else’s light that actually could shine brightly.

When you wear a mask, you rob not only yourself of what you could be, but you rob others of their ability to be who they are around you. If you are wearing a mask, please lose it.  Halloween should only come one time a year, and life is not an everyday masquerade ball.

©2018 J Clay Norton

Remember… THINK LEADERSHIP!

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