The Two Sides of Leadership Debt…

26 Friday Feb 2021

Posted by The Book Chamber in Advantage, Agenda, Authentic, Conversations, Expectations, Future, Leader, Leadership, Transactional, Transformational

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On the way home from school in the afternoons, I listen to talk radio. It can vary from local to national news, sports, and even money. The other day I was scanning the channels and stopped on The Dave Ramsey Show. In his intro, after a break, many times, he will say, “Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show where debt is dumb, and cash is king.” And as usual, that got me to thinking.

Debt… to owe someone else. Most of the time, we think about debt as being related to money. However, many times I see leaders who have what I call “leadership debt.” Yes, I believe “leadership debt” is a thing, it is happening to many, and there is also another side to it.

As you look and listen, we often see transactional leadership taking place – “do this for me, and I’ll do this for you.” I believe that leadership should be a healthy mix of transformational and transactional leadership, with a higher percentage leaning toward transformational. However, when transactional leadership takes place, usually we end up owing.

It goes something like this…
“Hey, I need a favor.
Ok, what can I do for you?
Well, I need such and such, and if you can come through for me, I will return the favor.
When?
Well, I’m not in a position to do it now, but when I am… I will take care of you.”

It seems to me only one person in the conversation got what they wanted. The other person just sits and waits. So, who owes the debt? I guess you would probably say the person who received the favor. But… what about the person who made good on their end? What did they get? If we think about it in terms of money, they “paid” for something and did not get anything in return but a future promise, and we know how promises are kept… Ultimately, there seems to be only one winner, but do they really win? I see both parties in some form of debt isolation.

The hard part of all of this is many leaders can help others. That is one of the main characteristics of leadership – helping. Do they sometimes need favors? Sure. I do think, however, that they do not need to go around owing others on future promises, while at the same time, the ones who are “paying” need to make sure the return of their investment is healthy, but the return needs to be almost immediate. And when that leader does get to where they can repay… leadership amnesia sets in all the sudden.

I guess what I am trying to say is this… If someone asks you for a “favor,” do it because you want to, not expecting anything in return. Quit giving of yourself to make others look good for their own agenda, and they will start seeking out other weak-minded people. Be true to yourself. When you are, you will be seen as true to others. While at the same time, if you are the one always asking for favors, quit “getting” others to help you get what you want. Do it on your own merit. Yes, it might take more time, and it might cramp your style that you cannot do something you want now, but you will be seen as a much better person.

Yes, Dave Ramsey is right… debt is dumb, but it is even dumber to pay for something and receive nothing in return. As James states, “Let your ‘yes’ be yes, and your ‘no’ be no” (ESV, 2001, James 5:12).

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

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Passion and the Why – Is it good or bad?

15 Friday Jan 2021

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Agenda, Attitude, Authentic, Character, Choice, Deciding, Decisions, Emotion, Know Your Why, Leader, Leadership, Motivation, Passion, Perception, Value

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In last week’s blog, I wrote on “Decision Making – Emotional or Factual?” One of the three areas where I believe decisions are made is with passion. A few people commented on it enough that I thought I would just use “passion” for our topic this week.

Going along with the title, is your “passion” for what you believe in good or bad? How you answer this, I know, is based on one’s perception and relativeness. However, I also know that putting perception and relativeness aside, your passion is defined by your values and even more by your core values. One of my great mentors at Mississippi College stated, “Values are what you believe in, core values are where you draw the line in the sand.”

A few friends emailed or stopped by to discuss “passion” as they see it regarding making decisions. Here are a few specific comments…

“To take positions we have to take for our clients, I must not only believe in the “rightness” of that position, but I need to have some passion for advancing that position… There are sometimes I do not believe in the “rightness” of what they wanted me to advance. The facts didn’t ‘geehaw’ with my core beliefs.”

“My experience is that some measure of passion for your positions on issues and core beliefs is necessary; otherwise, you come across as passive and lack genuineness.”

“It’s when passion is inappropriately expressed does it become detrimental. However, when you can exhibit passion properly (non-inflammatory), can passion help your cause.”

These are “spot on” with my belief as well on passion. Our passion has to be for the right thing. The “right thing” is where it gets fuzzy… I would say that the “right thing” depends on your “why”… the outcome you want (tangibles and intangibles), goals, motivation, attitude, etc… Is it for good or bad? Do you want revenge or to promote unity? Is your passion for selfish reasons, or is it being for others? Mostly, what is your agenda? I believe these are underlying thoughts as to what “fuels” our passion.

Upon a little digging… “The root of the word “passion” is found in the Latin word “passio.” From the late 1500’s “passio” began to take on the meaning of emotion and, in some cases, controlled emotion. And now we know why passion can help or hurt… it all depends on the “why” and if it is controlled.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

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Things Leaders Should Not Say…

25 Friday Sep 2020

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Authentic, Culture, Education, Intentions, Leader, Leadership, Mandates, Purpose, Relationships, Servant, Teachers, Value

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Remember growing up and hearing… “Do as I say, not as I do?” If it was not heard in your house, then you probably heard it somewhere else. Maybe there is a need for it while you are young and learn to be more mature with age, but when did you really take notice of the fact that “Do as I say, not as I do” phrase quit carrying value?

Better yet, let me drop this phrase on you… “Because I said so…” Heard that lately? The same questions from above can be asked here as well. How about this one… “You signed up for this…” or “Well, this is the way we are going to do it, and if you don’t like it…” One more, “We have always done it this way…”

Let’s look at it from an organizational perspective with leadership…

What is going on if you are hearing that from leadership in your work environment? Questions that quickly come to mind… What does it say about the culture of your work environment, and what is it saying about them, as a leader, directly?

As for culture, I believe that it is set by the group as a whole but is determined and sometimes developed by the expectations of leadership. To start, let me say that I believe culture is learned behavior until an agent of change comes in, or there is a paradigm shift. Too often, we forget that our culture is what we make it, not always what is mandated. However, if leadership is not abiding in and with the same parameters of their own expectations, then a disconnect is easily seen. Once it is seen, that disconnect creates breaks that has a hard time healing.

As for why a leader would have to say the above statements, well… Often leaders will say they operate on a different set of “rules.” Really? Different roles, yes, but rules? Nothing brings resentment to the boiling point quicker than a leader asking someone to do something they are not willing to do themselves, or stating they do not have to follow certain rules because they are in a position of leadership.

Last thought… What we say as leaders matter, how we actively live what we speak out matters even more—any saying that limits the originality or the why of your culture shows a mindset that is unwilling to grow, resentment will build, and relationships will suffer.

If a leader is having to say comments like these mentioned above or any others that come to your mind, then odds are they are very close to losing the culture, the respect, and, most of all, their leadership. They might still be in “charge,” but it is truly by title only. It might be due to their insecurities, knowing they really do not understand how to be a leader.

It would be interesting to hear from readers as to what you think leaders should not say… I bet we could get a pretty good running thread…

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

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Yo-Yo Leadership…

06 Thursday Feb 2020

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Authentic, Communication, Courage, Culture, Engagement, Essence, Expectations, Humility, Leader, Leadership, Message, Purpose, Servant, Sincerity, Understanding, Value

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We can all agree or should, at least, that leadership is not about popularity. Oh, but how many “leaders,” think and lead that way. You know them…

What begins as, hopefully, a genuine desire to serve others in leadership soon can become nothing more than an act of impressing others. If a leader’s leadership depends on the applause and approval of others, the genuineness, or lack of, is so apparent, people get blindsided because of it. And there lies the problem….

I read something the other day about popularity being similar to a yo-yo. I thought it was funny because we all know some yo-yos. Yo-yo up, yo-yo down. Now, it has been a while since I toyed around with a yo-yo, but as I reflect, I can definitely see how the analogy takes true. As the yo-yo goes down, gravity takes over, everything is natural. As the yo-yo comes back up, it is drawn back with a force of having to get back to the top.

As I thought more about popularity and the yo-yo, I transferred the concept to leadership. Does your leadership, naturally work, or are you leading because of a controlling force? And the most critical question to answer today is, “Is that controlling force your wanting to be liked?” When things are going well, we strut and swag; when not, we drop our head and mope. When your wanting to be liked becomes the “want of your day,” nothing good happens. It makes you miserable (it should) and others around you miserable.

Let people like you because they see true leadership in you. It seems that a reoccurring theme in my blogs is talking about “being for others.” I think we should; why would we not? But it is tough to be for others when we are for ourselves first. It goes back to a thought I had the other day… “Finding value in what we know instead of what we think carries greater leadership responsibility.” Lead because you know… If we do not, how can we ask for society to grow to be better leaders? Be popular becasue you are respected, not the other way around. Bottom line… Do not be a yo-yo leader!

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others

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