This past Sunday, our pastor, in his sermon, alluded to the idea of what true friendship really is and is not. As I listened and thought about that idea this week, as always… “it got me to thinking.”
We all have friendships in our lives. They come and go, change, etc. As I look back, it is funny to see our “friendship map” and where it has taken us.
Friendship is tough to define. Often, our definition of friendship is what we make it in order to meet our needs at a specific time in our lives…
Anyway, as I have been thinking about friendships this week, I am very thankful for the friends I have. Those who accept and take me for who and what I am, and most importantly – my well-being. I think there lies the true measure of friendship.
I’m a HUGE Charlie Brown fan…
So… friendship…
First, I believe friendship only happens with people you actually spend time with. It is hard to develop a friendship if you are never around a person. And no, friendship is not the number of “friends” you have on social media.
Second, friendship needs to enjoy one another’s company. We are around a lot of people daily. Friends, sure… but is the measure of that only surface, or does it cut deep?
Third, it is hard to have friendships without common interests. I have said it time and time again, “There is something to be said about having like-minded, kindred-spirited people” in your lives. There are only so many conversations one can have on family and the weather.
Fourth, this is where it will get interesting. We have to have friends that will “get into your business.” If you cannot have honest, heartfelt conversations, then the friend status might need to be “un”checked.
Lastly, friendship must not only offer encouragement, but it must also be willing to help in a time of need. I am not talking about times where “I need a favor.” I’m talking about no matter who, what, when, why, or where… that friend will be there, no questions asked.
I hope you have friends who have the characteristics above. I do, and for that, I am whatever is beyond thankful. If you get a chance, you might want to tell them that.
Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…
For what it is worth, I am not a fan of “reposting” my blogs. However, I am reposting the blog “United or Divided” today. This blog was originally written on January 26, 2018. I believe that leadership stands and transcends time and many other things and ideas as well.
When I wrote the blog the first time, it was written with the idea that we are in a crossroads of education. Now, as a Nation, we are as well.
Only one sentence I will add for the blog is this… “We, as people, must find our likeness in Christ for healing to begin and to sustain.”
I hope you enjoy the re-post.
Below you will find the lyrics to the new song by Christian artist, Mandisa, “Bleed The Same.” The other day I heard it for the first time on KLOVE riding down the road. Like many things, it made me start thinking…
We say this, and we say that, only to get and keep the same results. We say we want more or better, but we do not put the effort in to change. Many times we might even be influenced by others who do not want to change. I/we want to…. I/we wish… I/we… The “want list” just goes on and on.
When it comes to the lives we live, they are the sum collections of thoughts created from experience or instilled as a way of life. However, the funny thing is, we are all in this together. At some point, we must acknowledge that everything in one way or another, affects everything else. The ripple effect might have diminished very small by the time it got to us but rippled it did.
Our world of humanity has its foundations based on morality. Sooner, rather than later, we should all know the difference between right and wrong. Yet we continue to make the same choices that enable our lives to stay the same, while at the same time always wanting more or better. The system can only be blamed so much. The issue becomes that we want the spotlight on others and their faults. We never want to turn the spotlight on ourselves. The last thing we want is for our inadequacies to be shown in the light.
I figure the best way to handle all of this, is to start with me. What am I doing to make it better? The “it” is anything that divides. It is united we stand. Can we (you, I, whoever) choose to work for a greater good? How many times does each of us have that one opportunity to do just that? Actually we have many opportunities. We just wait on someone else.
As you read the lyrics below, I would dare say that each of us would agree with everything it says. So many solid truths. Whatever change you want, let it start with you. Most of all, let others see it. Go out and prove it. Your essence of leadership does one of the two… it unites or divides.
Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…
Want to share this leadership thought with others? Click on one of the social media sharing buttons below and help spread the good…
If you want to listen to the song, click here:
We all bleed the same We’re more beautiful when we come together We all bleed the same So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided
Woke up today Another headline Another innocent life is taken In the name of hatred So hard to take (hey!) And if we think that it’s all good Then we’re mistaken ‘Cause my heart is breaking
Are you left? Are you right? Pointing fingers, taking sides When are we gonna realize?
We all bleed the same We’re more beautiful when we come together We all bleed the same So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided If we’re gonna fight Let’s fight for each other If we’re gonna shout Let love be the cry We all bleed the same So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided
Tell me, who are we To judge someone By the kind of clothes they’re wearing Or the color of their skin?
Are you black? (black) Are you white? (white) Aren’t we all the same inside? (the same inside) Father, open our eyes to see!
We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) We’re more beautiful when we come together We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided If we’re gonna fight Let’s fight for each other (fight for each other!) If we’re gonna shout Let love be the cry (be the cry!) We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided
Only love can drive out all the darkness What are we fighting for? We were made to carry one another We were made for more, said Only love can drive out all the darkness What are we fighting for? yeah We were made to carry one another We were made for more!
We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) We’re more beautiful when we come together (let’s stand united!) We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided If we’re gonna fight Let’s fight for each other (fight for each other!) If we’re gonna shout Let love be the cry (be the cry!) We all bleed the same(we all bleed the same) (bleed the same) Let’s stand united (let’s stand united) Let’s stand united!
So Father God, I pray That our families will come together right now And seek Your face You will forgive our sins And You will heal our incredible land In the name of the only Savior, Jesus Christ Amen
The educational world, as now, most definitely, has moved into the distance-learning mode. As educators, we can adapt as well as any profession. Try teaching 150 students with different personalities and different learning styles throughout one to two days. Yep… Did I say the ability to adapt?
You get the idea… However, what about leadership when it comes to the distance-learning mode? How does that look? Can we adapt? Yes, due to recent circumstances, most everything is done by remote, even leadership.
Let’s not talk about the collective decisions of leadership, let’s talk about the relationships of leadership. The decisions we make as leaders are usually made by a consensus, well-informed group, and then disseminated to everyone. I believe that it is just part of doing our jobs as leaders.
Now… on to the relationship part of leadership during these “distance” times…
More than ever, people are looking for leaders to guide them during uncertain times. Rest assured, a leader will always emerge in times of need. Leadership is challenging enough, without all the extra “stuff” that goes on. However, quality leaders probably do not have to change their “style” very much. On the other hand, if a leader leads from a “distance” to begin with, the need to change is now. At some point, if you do not change, then your “distance” leadership will turn into leadership that is so far away, it will be nonexistent leadership.
Here are a few quick thoughts that I have (and this goes for teachers as well)…
While a “blanket” text or email is fine, make a point to be intentional with a few people each day. Just create a running list… Communicate with them individually. If you call, they probably will answer and carry on a conversation. Showing some intentionality will create and possibly strengthen a bond you have with others. People, by nature, work better in a friendly environment. This environment carries over remotely. We really have no excuse, technology has made this so easy.
With regard to “distance” leadership, another thing is to trust. Yes, even remotely. In education, we must trust the teachers. They have more “jobs” going on remotely, then they do when at school. Let them do what they do best; teach. Tell teachers what needs to be done and let them go. Check on them, not their work, per se.
Leading from a distance requires more effort on our part. Now is an excellent time to really invest in the lives of our teams. Ask them something other than work or even weather-related. Ask their opinion on something that could benefit the whole (but do not ask, if you do not want to hear).
The unknown… that is where we are with educational leadership at the moment. However, we are becoming more familiar with it day by day. The only known is that we have had to adapt and change. Many a leader will rise or fall due to the choices of the decisions that they make during this pandemic. We will need the support of our teams. Make every effort and give your team a reason to support you.
Remember, as a leader, it is up to you to lead. If you do not, someone else will. If that happens, do not get upset. You had your chance… Do not be a “from a distance” leader, stay close. Society already has enough “distance” leaders as it is…
Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…
Ok… You are not sure about the title. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m not sure either. For what it is worth, I have never been known to be overly sensitive. Now, that is neither good or bad, but…
The question I want to tackle today is it ok for a leader to be sensitive? The answer probably depends on who you ask, and maybe where they are in their leadership. With anyone, the easy answer could be for some to be less sensitive, while others should be more sensitive.
I genuinely believe there are times when both need to be exhibited, and there is a very fine line between the two. But in any case, I can see it being more of a strength instead of a weakness. True experience is the greatest teacher here.
Quality leaders are sensitive to the realities of others. Consider that statement as it applies to you. Are we aware of the leadership battle that rages inside each of us? Do we realize that to walk in quality leadership, that is for others, is to live a leadership life that shows sensitivity to the things that go on and around us?
I’m not saying that you have to carry everything and everyone on a silver platter with kit gloves. That is not it at all. But to acknowledge and be in tune with the lives of the people around you speaks volumes for how you lead and, more importantly, how people will follow you.
Are you willing to step out behind that “Wizard of Oz” curtain and let others see that it is ok actually to care? There can be some level of security in being sensitive toward others in your leadership. Once you acknowledge this, be assured that others will also. When it happens, everyone will be better off.
Do not be known as the “leader” who flippantly shows the facade of caring. Be the leader that others know that what they see behind you, is the true meaning of your leadership… that you do care.
