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~ J Clay Norton, Ed.D.

The Book Chamber

Category Archives: Love

Valentine’s Musings…

11 Thursday Feb 2021

Posted by The Book Chamber in Actions, Family, Heart, Listening, Love, Relationships

≈ Leave a comment

Valentine’s…

The day we are told to celebrate our love for others…

Chocolates, flowers, and cards… Priced much higher than usual, just to show how much more we love for only one day? It is amazing to me how the price suddenly drops on February 15.

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Those chocolates taste the same, you know, and they are 75% off. You can truly get an assortment of assorted flavors. Also, you don’t feel bad about not liking a particular type and spitting it out. Paying full price makes you eat the ones you don’t care for.

And the flowers… aka ROSES. Yes, the ones that will die, even if you do use the plant food packet that comes with it… don’t we know they are dead already when they are cut? I tell Heather, “I’ll buy you a rose bush… that way we can plant it, and you can have roses anytime you want, all year long. You pick out the spot, and I’ll dig the hole.” Now that’s what I call love.

And the cards… You know the ones that bring the response, “Oh, that was so sweet of you.” The funny thing about cards… Someone else is really doing the talking for $7.95, and three days later… the garbage can. And if it is not a Hallmark, well… you just didn’t “…care enough to send the very best.”

I know… but you are saying, “It’s the thought that counts.”

Yes, the thought… Where is that same thought for the other 364 days of the year?

The thought… Why don’t we ever say, “It’s the action that counts.” Is love not suppose to be a verb, the action of doing? I can think a lot of stuff, but if action is never there, then what good is the thought. It just falls on deaf ears, mine and yours alone.

So, what does love look like in action? I cannot answer that for you, nor can you answer that for me. What works for you might not work for me and vice versa. But I do have some ideas…

Love…
Makes the bed, picks up in the house, does the laundry, feeds the dogs, bathes the dogs, sacrifices their time for others, watches an action-killing movie instead of a chick-flick (or the other way around), goes to the grocery store, takes walks, rides bikes, drives the vehicle because you don’t like to drive, plans meals to make sure we eat healthy, empties the dishwasher, holds your hand, brags on you, provides a Godly example to our daughter, prays for the family… Love will even read your blog on Thursday nights to make sure it is all in order.

Love can also listen, laugh, and even cry. But more important than all of the above…

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends…” (I Corinthians 13:4-8b, ESV).

Happy Valentine’s Day

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2021 J Clay Norton

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United or Divided? (A Re-post)

26 Friday Jun 2020

Posted by The Book Chamber in Agenda, Attitude, Change, Character, Conversations, Courage, Crisis, Culture, Expectations, Freedom, Future, Honest, Humility, Inspiration, Integrity, Intentions, Leader, Leadership, Listening, Love, Purpose, Reflection, Relationships, Sincerity, Trust, Understanding, Unity, Value

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For what it is worth, I am not a fan of “reposting” my blogs. However, I am reposting the blog “United or Divided” today. This blog was originally written on January 26, 2018. I believe that leadership stands and transcends time and many other things and ideas as well.

When I wrote the blog the first time, it was written with the idea that we are in a crossroads of education. Now, as a Nation, we are as well. 

Only one sentence I will add for the blog is this…  “We, as people, must find our likeness in Christ for healing to begin and to sustain.” 

I hope you enjoy the re-post.

Below you will find the lyrics to the new song by Christian artist, Mandisa, “Bleed The Same.” The other day I heard it for the first time on KLOVE riding down the road. Like many things, it made me start thinking…

We say this, and we say that, only to get and keep the same results. We say we want more or better, but we do not put the effort in to change. Many times we might even be influenced by others who do not want to change. I/we want to…. I/we wish… I/we… The “want list” just goes on and on.

When it comes to the lives we live, they are the sum collections of thoughts created from experience or instilled as a way of life. However, the funny thing is, we are all in this together. At some point, we must acknowledge that everything in one way or another, affects everything else. The ripple effect might have diminished very small by the time it got to us but rippled it did.

Our world of humanity has its foundations based on morality. Sooner, rather than later, we should all know the difference between right and wrong. Yet we continue to make the same choices that enable our lives to stay the same, while at the same time always wanting more or better. The system can only be blamed so much. The issue becomes that we want the spotlight on others and their faults. We never want to turn the spotlight on ourselves. The last thing we want is for our inadequacies to be shown in the light.

I figure the best way to handle all of this, is to start with me. What am I doing to make it better? The “it” is anything that divides. It is united we stand. Can we (you, I, whoever) choose to work for a greater good? How many times does each of us have that one opportunity to do just that? Actually we have many opportunities.  We just wait on someone else.

As you read the lyrics below, I would dare say that each of us would agree with everything it says. So many solid truths. Whatever change you want, let it start with you. Most of all, let others see it. Go out and prove it. Your essence of leadership does one of the two… it unites or divides.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

 

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2018 J Clay Norton

©2020 J Clay Norton (edited)

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If you want to listen to the song, click here:

 

We all bleed the same
We’re more beautiful when we come together
We all bleed the same
So tell me why, tell me why
We’re divided

Woke up today
Another headline
Another innocent life is taken
In the name of hatred
So hard to take (hey!)
And if we think that it’s all good
Then we’re mistaken
‘Cause my heart is breaking

Are you left?
Are you right?
Pointing fingers, taking sides
When are we gonna realize?

We all bleed the same
We’re more beautiful when we come together
We all bleed the same
So tell me why, tell me why
We’re divided
If we’re gonna fight
Let’s fight for each other
If we’re gonna shout
Let love be the cry
We all bleed the same
So tell me why, tell me why
We’re divided

Tell me, who are we
To judge someone
By the kind of clothes they’re wearing
Or the color of their skin?

Are you black? (black)
Are you white? (white)
Aren’t we all the same inside? (the same inside)
Father, open our eyes to see!

We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same)
We’re more beautiful when we come together
We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same)
So tell me why, tell me why
We’re divided
If we’re gonna fight
Let’s fight for each other (fight for each other!)
If we’re gonna shout
Let love be the cry (be the cry!)
We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same)
So tell me why, tell me why
We’re divided

Only love can drive out all the darkness
What are we fighting for?
We were made to carry one another
We were made for more, said
Only love can drive out all the darkness
What are we fighting for? yeah
We were made to carry one another
We were made for more!

We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same)
We’re more beautiful when we come together (let’s stand united!)
We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same)
So tell me why, tell me why
We’re divided
If we’re gonna fight
Let’s fight for each other (fight for each other!)
If we’re gonna shout
Let love be the cry (be the cry!)
We all bleed the same(we all bleed the same) (bleed the same)
Let’s stand united (let’s stand united)
Let’s stand united!

So Father God, I pray
That our families will come together right now
And seek Your face
You will forgive our sins
And You will heal our incredible land
In the name of the only Savior, Jesus Christ
Amen

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Maslow Was Right…

03 Friday Apr 2020

Posted by The Book Chamber in Appreciation, Consistency, coronavirus, covid19, Decisions, Education, Educational Leadership, Encouragement, Foundation, Leader, Leadership, Love, Purpose, Relationships, Teachers, Understanding, Value

≈ 3 Comments

Wow, what a few days and weeks can do to change the way education is…

As I sit here, at our kitchen table, writing this blog, I consider how education is exponentially changing, and for the better, I might add, (I hope). As educators, we have been given and give direction as to how education needs to work the past few weeks, and it appears how it needs to work in the months forthcoming.

One conversation that I have had with myself lately (I have a lot of those by the way) is, “How are teachers and students adjusting?” I somewhat have an idea of the teacher’s side of it, but what are our students thinking at this moment? For what apparent reason, I do not know, but Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs came to mind. If you are an educator, you should know what this is.

Your quick “Reader’s Digest” compressed write-up is this…
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs was introduced by Abraham Maslow in 1943. The pyramid reflects the universal needs of society, in stages of human development. The most critical layer of the pyramid is the first layer, and upward a person moves. However, for a person to move upward, each layer below must be complete. The layers are, starting from the bottom as the foundation are: physiological, safety, love/belonging, esteem, and self-actualization.

Well, now the question you might be asking yourself is, “What does this have to with education?” I am glad you asked… Education is dealing with people (I know, duh moment for everyone). What I notice is that in Maslow’s Hierarchy, there is not a single layer that refers to an IQ of a person, but every layer can be associated with EQ.

The first layer is the Physiological layer, and while that is the foundation, the other layers are important as well. However, if our students and teachers, for that matter, do not have the foundational layer of their physiological needs met, then the chance to move upward is not going to happen, or if they do move up, it will be with limited motivation, and there is an increase in displeasure within an individual. What does all this mean? If a student is struggling to have their physiological needs met, then they are unlikely to pursue safety, belongingness, esteem, and self-actualization. And let’s throw in doing classwork for that matter.

With all the above being said, hopefully, you can see now why what we do as teachers during this “displaced” time is so essential for our students. The other day I was strolling through Twitter and saw this quote by Dr. Brad Johnson, who is an advocate for education… “Relationships before rigor, Grace before grades, Patience before programs, Love before lessons.” As I saw that, the first question that came to my mind was this… “How many educators are conducting their distance learning as if they were teaching the exact same way as if they were in the classroom?” “Newness of lessons be gone, I’ll just teach as if I were there,” they might say. If this is true, then we are failing measurably at meeting the EQ of our students.

The other day I tweeted out, “As educators, we have a powerful opportunity to be a constant example in our student’s lives during this time.” If we encourage them with relationships, patience, and love, then the rigor, programs, and lessons will fall in place. If we can help students help themselves, then they will be closer to moving up the layers of the pyramid and possibly gaining the self-actualization that we all want them to have. Motivation to succeed is not always innate with our students. The more we can do for them, the more I believe they will do for us. The time for us as educators to truly teach is here. Be the teacher our students need during this time.

Thank you to all the first responders and teachers doing what they do best.  If you see one, say thank you.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others

©2020 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts?  Follow me on…

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Teaching with the language of the heart…

15 Friday Feb 2019

Posted by The Book Chamber in Heart, Leader, Leadership, Love, Maturity, Servant, Teachers, Vision

≈ Leave a comment

With this being the standard week of giving cards of love and yesterday Valentine’s Day, I would like to touch on how teachers and leaders can reach the hearts of their students and followers.

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Understanding that one box of chocolate does not fit all and more importantly, you throwing a red rose blanket at the feet of others does not cover all; there are certain points a teacher can make that are exemplary of their leadership for others that truly comes from the heart.

Challenge them

Great teachers are not afraid to challenge the heart of a student. How do you do this? You step into the unknown, looking for opportunities that can help a student grow. You inspire their hearts to the point that they want to do and be better. Sometimes, that even means going against what the pacing guide or the curriculum says to do that day. No one is ever for the better if they are always staying the same and unchallenged. Challenge students to succeed, not to fail.

Make your classroom a shared vision

While you are the teacher, your classroom should be more about your students than you — a shared environment, where ownership exists between both parties. What is the vision you want your students to see? Too many times, teachers “box” their students in, keeping the lid closed, stifling their growth. A shared vision pulls students forward. Be willing to speak their language and have an idea of who they are. Together, your classroom becomes much more conducive to teaching and learning.

Model the mature way

Someone has to be the adult in the classroom; please let it be you. Yes, you, as the teacher or leader, must model the mature, professional way. This is the behavior that wins the respect of others. Do not be the clownfish who drowns in their own immaturity. You set the standard, let them be high. Why would you set them low? Having a quiet strength has been shown to win the day more often than not.

Teach from the heart

This is why we teach and lead… or suppose to anyway. It is our calling that enables us to build students up who are torn down by society. With the concept of “me first” being propagated everywhere one looks, the one constant has to be your teaching from the heart. This is the only way we can lift spirits, and promote a better way. Knowing what to teach is nowhere equal to knowing how to teach.

While every one of the above topics aligns with servant-leadership, it goes without asking, “What are we here for as teachers?” As an educator, are you trying to pull the best out of a student from the inside, where their heart is, instead of pushing something down their throat from the outside? Like anything else in life, for all involved, understanding the why of something increases the likelihood of a better effort given. Why a person does anything can always be seen by where their heart is.

Teach with the language of the heart, you just might be able to see a heart melt and turn into something solid.

©2019 J Clay Norton

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Remember… THINK LEADERSHIP!

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