Category Archives: Appreciation

Genuine kindness – Where did it go?

29 Friday Jan 2021

Posted by in Appreciation, Conversations, Culture, Decisions, Kindness, Leader, Leadership, Mask, Message, Relationships, Value

≈ 6 Comments

Today’s world comes at us every morning with the dog-eat-dog mentality. I have to get what is mine. Yes, I will speak to you or nod your way, but to genuinely acknowledge where the other person felt kindness… not so much. Why? Where did society take a wrong turn, and genuine kindness got left behind.

A few thoughts before I get into my other thoughts…
One, I believe technology has really hurt society in this area. Yes, there are many good, quality aspects of technology… but ultimately, what I see has happened is people are now able to hide behind their keyboards and type what they wish they could say but are afraid of the ramifications. It is almost as if the keyboard is the mask of insecurity they wear.

Ok… enough. Get to the kindness…
I heard Billy Joel’s song the other day, “We Didn’t Start the Fire,” and there is one line in the song… “I can’t take it anymore.” Well, that is often how I feel. We cannot escape… The radio, the TV, the social media, the complainers, the _________.

Ok… the kindness…
Why can’t we just be kind? It might take some effort, but it beats not being kind. Where has that ever gotten anyone?

Kindness is never arrogant. Kindness is humility. Knowing no one is really any better. Find what works for individuals and build a relationship. Quit the “me!” Try having a true interest in others. Not what you can get from them, but what they can give. That’s genuine kindness.

Say thank you that shows value… yes, appreciation. We are so worried that we are not going to get the recognition we deserve. Who cares besides you? One day, someone is going to throw that plaque in the garbage anyway. Genuine kindness celebrates others and fosters success for them.

It does not take long to figure out when kindness is not in the air. It just doesn’t smell right. You know that smell… the smell of “stuff-upedness.”
It is very hard to have a connection with others when that odor is around. As soon as they walk in the door, they say, “You smell something?”

I truly believe genuine kindness helps people motivate themselves. And when that happens, empowerment is felt and seen. Trust and respect take on new definitions, and results are an after product instead of a grind.

Quick question… You want to know if your kindness is genuine? Quick answer with a question… Are others inspired because of you?

In the end, kindness puts others first. I’m talking about leadership here… Your leadership message is for others, not you. Genuine kindness has the ability to relate to others—more about them, less about you.

Genuine kindness – where did it go? It really never left. Maybe we just forgot it was there. Genuine kindness is good for you and good for others.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2021 J Clay Norton

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Expectations and plans that go astray?

02 Friday Oct 2020

Posted by in Appreciation, Attitude, Circumstances, coronavirus, COVID-19, Decisions, Expectations, Understanding

≈ 4 Comments

Have you ever experienced disappointment when you had to change plans or when plans were changed for you?

As creatures of habit, we have carefully arranged the details of our lives and the things we are involved in. We all have expectations that we look forward to accomplishing, but the results are not always what we envisioned.

Somewhere, in all of life, circumstances show up. Sometimes they get in the way; other times, they open up another lane to possibilities we would have never thought. It is the “what do we do with” these circumstances that matter.

Frustration and celebration are the hallmarks results of circumstances; hopes are dashed, and parties are thrown. Looking back, which result has been the most in your life? For some reason, I would want to say, “The one where my hopes were dashed.”

Why do we tend to focus on the “stuff” that does not go our way? I can start naming plenty. But then, to convince myself I am not being negative-minded, I switch to the times as I look back, and realize I am glad that some of the expectations I had, did go a different direction… now, but definitely not then.

History is full of people who thought setbacks were just that, setbacks. You have had a few, I have had a few, we all have had a few… Here is the funny thing about expectations and plans that go astray… everyone is equal opportunity. We all face, at one time or another, the disruption of our expectations.

What would happen if we changed our mindset on the front end when plans change? Is that even possible? Easy to say, hard to do. However, it does go back to what I stated above; it is the “what do we do with” these circumstances that matter. It is easy to say, “Look for the silver lining.”

As I was thinking about what to write this week, I had one of my “memory moments” and thought back to a situation when I was “young and dumb,” that did not go as I wanted or had planned. Looking back to this and other times, I cannot say that I am glad they happened. However, I can say that I am glad plans do change sometimes. With changes, we never know who the people are we might meet, the things we can learn differently or new, or how our character might be shaped to help us down the road with another circumstance that comes our way. In many cases, I am a better person because my plans were changed.

For the times we do not know the why, the how, or even understand the timing of the disruptions of our lives, change is the constant. For the times that do not go as I have wanted them to go, I learn and create a reference point for the future, and for those that have worked out for the better, I am thankful.

In each case, to quote Robert Frost… “And that has made all the difference.”

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2020 J Clay Norton

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The Intrinsic Value of Teaching…

08 Friday May 2020

Posted by in Appreciation, confidence, Education, Leader, Leadership, Purpose, Teacher Appreciation, Teachers, Value, Whole

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Fictional conversation…
“It’s Teacher Appreciation Week.
Are you serious?
Yes!
I thought we just had Teacher Appreciation Week.
No, that was this same time last year.
Oh… Well, I guess we need to do or say something for them?
Are you saying or asking?
Both, I guess.
We could put something on Social Media.
Probably, but do you think that is enough?
Well, even though we don’t tell them often enough, they know we do.
Yea, they know we appreciate them.
But, do they?”

It amazes me how often groups have to have a “week” named for them to see or hear words of appreciation…

First of all, let me say Happy Teacher Appreciation Week. As I have stated before, “Educators might be the last great hope to help change society for the better.”

I like the word “intrinsic.” A quick lookup would give you this as a definition: “belonging to a thing by its very nature.”

Here are a few thoughts I have…

The fulness of a teacher’s purpose is to totally give of themselves to the absorption of others, where they are seen through eyes that want learning and understand the value it brings. This can only be done with intrinsic value. This is my perspective of what an appreciated teacher is and should look like.

If there was never an “Appreciation Week” or if teachers were never given praise, teachers would still have value, by virtue of who they are. Take a teacher out of the school building and let them “be normal,” you would never know the difference between them and other people. That is one of the beauties of being an educator, we are just like everyone else, while at the same time, totally different. You see, the only agenda a teacher has is to want what is best for students now and for the future. Society is fueled by competition to reward the individual, education is fueled by collaborative work to reward the whole.

The value of an educator can never be taken away. It may be attacked (usually by jealously or ignorance), but it cannot be diminished. A teacher’s value is it’s being. We are nothing more than the sum of what we do; that is to teach. We are one of a few professions that give of ourselves, and the really good teachers do not seek any glory. The glory they find is often seen in the transformation of students, and there you will find that the glory resides within the hearts and minds of those students.

Here is the deal with teachers… We have good days, we have bad days. Each day we try to make it better than the last one. We want to be the best at our jobs. The more our goal is to get everyone on the same page, the more perfect our job becomes. The success of a teacher is found when we can duplicate that day after day.

Intrinsic… “belonging to a thing by its very nature.” A teacher’s value will never be adequately measured.  However, educators know their true value, and maybe that is why they do what many choose not to.

The role of what a teacher does is extraordinary. Make an effort today to say thank you to one. Teaching, an appreciation? YES… All-day, every day – THANK YOU, TEACHERS!

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others

©2020 J Clay Norton

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Maslow Was Right…

03 Friday Apr 2020

Posted by in Appreciation, Consistency, coronavirus, covid19, Decisions, Education, Educational Leadership, Encouragement, Foundation, Leader, Leadership, Love, Purpose, Relationships, Teachers, Understanding, Value

≈ 3 Comments

Wow, what a few days and weeks can do to change the way education is…

As I sit here, at our kitchen table, writing this blog, I consider how education is exponentially changing, and for the better, I might add, (I hope). As educators, we have been given and give direction as to how education needs to work the past few weeks, and it appears how it needs to work in the months forthcoming.

One conversation that I have had with myself lately (I have a lot of those by the way) is, “How are teachers and students adjusting?” I somewhat have an idea of the teacher’s side of it, but what are our students thinking at this moment? For what apparent reason, I do not know, but Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs came to mind. If you are an educator, you should know what this is.

Your quick “Reader’s Digest” compressed write-up is this…
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs was introduced by Abraham Maslow in 1943. The pyramid reflects the universal needs of society, in stages of human development. The most critical layer of the pyramid is the first layer, and upward a person moves. However, for a person to move upward, each layer below must be complete. The layers are, starting from the bottom as the foundation are: physiological, safety, love/belonging, esteem, and self-actualization.

Well, now the question you might be asking yourself is, “What does this have to with education?” I am glad you asked… Education is dealing with people (I know, duh moment for everyone). What I notice is that in Maslow’s Hierarchy, there is not a single layer that refers to an IQ of a person, but every layer can be associated with EQ.

The first layer is the Physiological layer, and while that is the foundation, the other layers are important as well. However, if our students and teachers, for that matter, do not have the foundational layer of their physiological needs met, then the chance to move upward is not going to happen, or if they do move up, it will be with limited motivation, and there is an increase in displeasure within an individual. What does all this mean? If a student is struggling to have their physiological needs met, then they are unlikely to pursue safety, belongingness, esteem, and self-actualization. And let’s throw in doing classwork for that matter.

With all the above being said, hopefully, you can see now why what we do as teachers during this “displaced” time is so essential for our students. The other day I was strolling through Twitter and saw this quote by Dr. Brad Johnson, who is an advocate for education… “Relationships before rigor, Grace before grades, Patience before programs, Love before lessons.” As I saw that, the first question that came to my mind was this… “How many educators are conducting their distance learning as if they were teaching the exact same way as if they were in the classroom?” “Newness of lessons be gone, I’ll just teach as if I were there,” they might say. If this is true, then we are failing measurably at meeting the EQ of our students.

The other day I tweeted out, “As educators, we have a powerful opportunity to be a constant example in our student’s lives during this time.” If we encourage them with relationships, patience, and love, then the rigor, programs, and lessons will fall in place. If we can help students help themselves, then they will be closer to moving up the layers of the pyramid and possibly gaining the self-actualization that we all want them to have. Motivation to succeed is not always innate with our students. The more we can do for them, the more I believe they will do for us. The time for us as educators to truly teach is here. Be the teacher our students need during this time.

Thank you to all the first responders and teachers doing what they do best.  If you see one, say thank you.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others

©2020 J Clay Norton

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