Ugh… that tastes bitter. Even worse, that bitter taste can sometimes linger, and it begins to be all we think about; talk about distracting. It will probably hinder us from tasting the good of other things also.
But… what does bitter look like? Good question. Better yet, what does bitter leadership look like, and why is it such a thing? First, what is bitterness? A quick lookup gives this definition – having a sharp, pungent taste or smell, not sweet. Hello… not sweet, pungent… Talk about a bad quality of leadership… How about this statement, “I have a bitter taste in my mouth about…” Yep, been there, said that. Pungent… doesn’t even sound like a good word to say.
I would say, most of the time, our bitterness is always going to be with something or someone else. It mostly comes with disappointments which leads to frustrations, not only with yourself but others. Bitterness in your life affects so many things; confidence, mood, performance, likeability, respect… most of all, love. It deprives the sweetness of what leadership should be.
One area I see bitterness is in leaders who only think their way is “the only way.” They lead with blinders that prevent them from seeing anything anyone else has to say. By default, others begin to question, respect is lost, and their leadership becomes a facade, seen right through. I guess, in the end, bitterness comes and goes, but the effects can last much longer. A full circle runs through all people, especially when we do not get our way.
So… how can we fight bitterness? I am not sure there is an absolute answer. However, I have seen enough leaders with bitterness that I have some ideas on how I do not want to lead. First, be open to ideas and not have a closed-mind set. Second, be transparent with your leadership. If we can incorporate both of these concepts in our leadership, we will lead better, and others will not have to be bitter because you are.
Go figure and it sounds easy. However, when our EGO gets in the way, bitterness is going to taste bad. Let’s lead with a sweetness.
Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…
As far as I can remember back… Patch, Buffy, Magnum, Putter, Bogey, Bailey, Roxi, and now Charlee and Hershey. These were and are the dogs of my life. So… why write a leadership blog on our dogs or dogs in general?
I saw this quote the other day… “Dogs are the only animals that love you more than they love themselves.” I immediately thought about our dogs and analogies of leadership. Loving those you lead more than you love yourself. Why not?
So… Here are a few thoughts on dogs and leadership…
They remember the past but live in the “now” and wag their tail First, I will say that dogs do remember the past based on how they are trained. I also believe they remember the past on how they are treated. I guess the only time a dog thinks future is when it will be fed or when their ears will be rubbed. Charlee, our Bassett, is my example here. Charlee is a lot like me, stubborn in some areas. We have trained her, all but beat her, loved her, given her treats, etc., and she will still pee by the back door every once in a while. Regardless, all she wants is to be fed, loved, and ears rubbed… now. Apparently, she could care less about the past and has no worries about the future. Charlee just wags her tail. She is one happy dog.
Leadership can work in the same way. Should it? I think so. Too many leaders live in the past, or even live in the future, per se, but seem to be oblivious to the present. While it is good to remember the past and look toward future planning, leadership that stays in the “now” leads now. Leadership that leads in the past gets old. Leadership that leads in the future tends to forget current events. We must have now to get to the future.
Loyal to the fullest extent Hershey, our Lab, will follow us anywhere, in or out of the house. And when I say she will sit right beside us, it is right beside us. If there is a word beyond loyal, then it applies to Hershey. Even when we were training her and on occasion correct her now, she remains loyal.
In leadership, the people we work with will have up and downs, mishaps, and such. Training and correction will and needs to happen. By nature, I genuinely believe that most people do not mess up on purpose. Quality leadership is and stays loyal. Too many times, I have seen leaders who want loyalty but do not give loyalty in return. Please do not be this type of leader.
They will fight and protect you Back in the day growing up, I must have done something wrong in the front yard, and my mom decided she would give me a whopping… Well, when my mom “pulled me up,” Patch, my dog then, got right between us and growled. The story goes that Patch got mom’s arm in her jaws but did not bite down. I don’t remember that episode, but needless to say, my mom never decided to whoop me where Patch was around after that.
That is what leadership should do, fight for you. Leadership should protect you. If you don’t fight and protect those you work with, well, they might not fight and protect you when you need it. While our dogs are not “guard dogs,” they do guard our surroundings. Leaders should do the same. Be a leader who is on guard for the people.
Do dogs really love you more than they love themselves? I have no idea. But it sure sounds good, doesn’t it? There is a lot we can learn from dogs. I have some more ideas, but the above three ideas are the ones that I thought stood out the best with leadership. I’m sure you can offer some analogies as well. I will also add this… leadership aside, dogs can show us how to love. Show a dog some love, and they will steal your heart and wag their tail.
Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…
The day we are told to celebrate our love for others…
Chocolates, flowers, and cards… Priced much higher than usual, just to show how much more we love for only one day? It is amazing to me how the price suddenly drops on February 15.
Those chocolates taste the same, you know, and they are 75% off. You can truly get an assortment of assorted flavors. Also, you don’t feel bad about not liking a particular type and spitting it out. Paying full price makes you eat the ones you don’t care for.
And the flowers… aka ROSES. Yes, the ones that will die, even if you do use the plant food packet that comes with it… don’t we know they are dead already when they are cut? I tell Heather, “I’ll buy you a rose bush… that way we can plant it, and you can have roses anytime you want, all year long. You pick out the spot, and I’ll dig the hole.” Now that’s what I call love.
And the cards… You know the ones that bring the response, “Oh, that was so sweet of you.” The funny thing about cards… Someone else is really doing the talking for $7.95, and three days later… the garbage can. And if it is not a Hallmark, well… you just didn’t “…care enough to send the very best.”
I know… but you are saying, “It’s the thought that counts.”
Yes, the thought… Where is that same thought for the other 364 days of the year?
The thought… Why don’t we ever say, “It’s the action that counts.” Is love not suppose to be a verb, the action of doing? I can think a lot of stuff, but if action is never there, then what good is the thought. It just falls on deaf ears, mine and yours alone.
So, what does love look like in action? I cannot answer that for you, nor can you answer that for me. What works for you might not work for me and vice versa. But I do have some ideas…
Love…
Makes the bed, picks up in the house, does the laundry, feeds the dogs, bathes the dogs, sacrifices their time for others, watches an action-killing movie instead of a chick-flick (or the other way around), goes to the grocery store, takes walks, rides bikes, drives the vehicle because you don’t like to drive, plans meals to make sure we eat healthy, empties the dishwasher, holds your hand, brags on you, provides a Godly example to our daughter, prays for the family… Love will even read your blog on Thursday nights to make sure it is all in order.
Love can also listen, laugh, and even cry. But more important than all of the above…
“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends…” (I Corinthians 13:4-8b, ESV).
Happy Valentine’s Day
Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…
For what it is worth, I am not a fan of “reposting” my blogs. However, I am reposting the blog “United or Divided” today. This blog was originally written on January 26, 2018. I believe that leadership stands and transcends time and many other things and ideas as well.
When I wrote the blog the first time, it was written with the idea that we are in a crossroads of education. Now, as a Nation, we are as well.
Only one sentence I will add for the blog is this… “We, as people, must find our likeness in Christ for healing to begin and to sustain.”
I hope you enjoy the re-post.
Below you will find the lyrics to the new song by Christian artist, Mandisa, “Bleed The Same.” The other day I heard it for the first time on KLOVE riding down the road. Like many things, it made me start thinking…
We say this, and we say that, only to get and keep the same results. We say we want more or better, but we do not put the effort in to change. Many times we might even be influenced by others who do not want to change. I/we want to…. I/we wish… I/we… The “want list” just goes on and on.
When it comes to the lives we live, they are the sum collections of thoughts created from experience or instilled as a way of life. However, the funny thing is, we are all in this together. At some point, we must acknowledge that everything in one way or another, affects everything else. The ripple effect might have diminished very small by the time it got to us but rippled it did.
Our world of humanity has its foundations based on morality. Sooner, rather than later, we should all know the difference between right and wrong. Yet we continue to make the same choices that enable our lives to stay the same, while at the same time always wanting more or better. The system can only be blamed so much. The issue becomes that we want the spotlight on others and their faults. We never want to turn the spotlight on ourselves. The last thing we want is for our inadequacies to be shown in the light.
I figure the best way to handle all of this, is to start with me. What am I doing to make it better? The “it” is anything that divides. It is united we stand. Can we (you, I, whoever) choose to work for a greater good? How many times does each of us have that one opportunity to do just that? Actually we have many opportunities. We just wait on someone else.
As you read the lyrics below, I would dare say that each of us would agree with everything it says. So many solid truths. Whatever change you want, let it start with you. Most of all, let others see it. Go out and prove it. Your essence of leadership does one of the two… it unites or divides.
Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…
Want to share this leadership thought with others? Click on one of the social media sharing buttons below and help spread the good…
If you want to listen to the song, click here:
We all bleed the same We’re more beautiful when we come together We all bleed the same So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided
Woke up today Another headline Another innocent life is taken In the name of hatred So hard to take (hey!) And if we think that it’s all good Then we’re mistaken ‘Cause my heart is breaking
Are you left? Are you right? Pointing fingers, taking sides When are we gonna realize?
We all bleed the same We’re more beautiful when we come together We all bleed the same So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided If we’re gonna fight Let’s fight for each other If we’re gonna shout Let love be the cry We all bleed the same So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided
Tell me, who are we To judge someone By the kind of clothes they’re wearing Or the color of their skin?
Are you black? (black) Are you white? (white) Aren’t we all the same inside? (the same inside) Father, open our eyes to see!
We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) We’re more beautiful when we come together We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided If we’re gonna fight Let’s fight for each other (fight for each other!) If we’re gonna shout Let love be the cry (be the cry!) We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided
Only love can drive out all the darkness What are we fighting for? We were made to carry one another We were made for more, said Only love can drive out all the darkness What are we fighting for? yeah We were made to carry one another We were made for more!
We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) We’re more beautiful when we come together (let’s stand united!) We all bleed the same (we all bleed the same) So tell me why, tell me why We’re divided If we’re gonna fight Let’s fight for each other (fight for each other!) If we’re gonna shout Let love be the cry (be the cry!) We all bleed the same(we all bleed the same) (bleed the same) Let’s stand united (let’s stand united) Let’s stand united!
So Father God, I pray That our families will come together right now And seek Your face You will forgive our sins And You will heal our incredible land In the name of the only Savior, Jesus Christ Amen
The Book Chamber 