Category Archives: Insecurity

(T)Issues of Leadership… It’s just one letter away! 

27 Friday Sep 2024

Posted by in Choice, Circumstances, Conflict, Consistency, Crisis, Culture, Deciding, Decisions, Disaster, Distractions, Education, Educational Leadership, Emotion, Emotional Temperature, Importance, Influence, Insecurity, Inspiration, Integrity, Intentional, Intentions, Issues, Knowledge, Leader, Leadership, Reality, Transparent, Trust, Understanding, Unity, Useful, Value

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I love analogies. I believe they are a better part of describing situations and are key in leadership thinking and reflection. So, today’s topic…

Let’s start with a simple yet profound observation: the word “issues” is just one letter away from “tissues.” This clever play on words serves as a powerful analogy for how personal issues can influence leadership.

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This simple play on words is a powerful reminder of how personal struggles can influence leadership. No leader has it all together, and those who think they do need to quit believing it; others know the truth. By default, I would venture into saying that many leaders carry some form of unresolved issues, good or bad. These issues might be deep-seeded from past experiences and might even be people in your unwanted circle. Still, when leaders carry unresolved issues, they burden themselves first and then affect the emotional and operational well-being of everyone around them. It’s like having the box of tissues ready handy for emotional spills (these can be good or bad also) – except, in this case, it’s needing those tissues to clean up the mess caused by unchecked issues that a leader has caused.

Leaders with unresolved issues often project their insecurities or frustrations onto others. What’s worse is that they make it seem as if you are the one at fault. I hate it when this happens. It’s like knowing a tornado is coming, and you need to run, take cover, at a right angle from that path. Whether it’s stress, poor communication, or unchecked ego (hello!), these personal challenges create a ripple effect. Everyone around becomes confused (for sure), demoralized (yes, it can happen), or even disengaged (probably so) because of the leader’s inconsistency or emotional volatility.

When leaders bring their personal issues into the working environment, they can inadvertently stifle innovation, breed negativity, and weaken the overall culture. This is where it gets serious…

But the sun is always shining behind the clouds… great leadership is about recognizing those issues and addressing them head-on. No leader is perfect, but the best ones are self-aware. They understand that their personal issues can affect their ability to make clear decisions, offer effective guidance, and create a positive culture.

Instead of burdening the team with their issues, emotionally intelligent leaders create an environment where challenges are tackled together—turning potential “tissue moments” into opportunities for growth and connection. Leadership is not about being flawless but about continually striving for improvement and ensuring personal issues don’t bleed into professional spaces. Sometimes, it is worth hearing to get out of your own way… and let’s leave the tissues for blowing our nose instead…

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2024 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts? Follow me on… X @thebookchamber or follow the blog directly.

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Cast Your Own Shadow…

11 Friday Aug 2023

Posted by in Actions, Authentic, Choice, Deciding, Decisions, Empower, Encouragement, Importance, Influence, Insecurity, Leader, Leadership, Passion, Shadows, Value

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Currently, we are watching the second season of Lincoln Lawyer on Netflix. During episode two, this quote was made “The more you live in someone’s shadow, kid, the longer it takes to cast your own.” I hit the pause button and told Heather, there is my blog for the week.

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The more I chewed on that, the more I realized that quote has gravity in so many areas of leadership. Not only individually but also as groups and corporate entities. The casting your shadow part of the quote made me realize how important it is to provide a reminder of the need to be who we are (not to say that we can do better, for we can, but that is not the point of today’s blog).

First, let me say we can always learn from others. That is valuable. However, true leadership emerges when we step into the light and let what we bring and can do be seen. Staying in the shadow of others is always comfortable, per se. At least you will always have shade… We need light to grow. Others need to see you doing that, and it helps us develop into who we are.

When we see what others are doing and succeeding, our default is to do what they are exactly doing. Take their template, stamp it onto ourselves, and wha la… we are the same. I think not. There are so many variables to consider, yet copy, we do.

With good reason, copying others can only take us so far. Leaders should be willing to cast their shadows and embrace their strengths and passions for who they are and whom they want to become based on a change that makes them better, not because they are “wanting to be what others are.” I’ve been trying to imitate Rory McIlroy’s golf swing and guess what… It ain’t working (bad grammar to prove the point).

Secondly, leadership should never overshadow others. To keep someone “shadowed” is nothing more than true insecurity. True leaders uplift their teams by providing guidance, support, and opportunities. By setting forth a leadership path, we should encourage others to do the same, creating a culture of empowerment and growth.

Casting your own shadow reflects on your strengths, weaknesses, and aspirations. Your unique qualities that drive your decisions are the foundation of your leadership identity. We push ourselves to improve our distinctive skills, not afraid to make mistakes. Casting your own shadow creates an authenticity that is leadership worthy. Leadership is not about imitation; it’s about inspiration. Leadership is not about mimicking others; it’s about harnessing your light to illuminate the way forward for yourself and those around you. Better yet, set a trail on fire.

Remember, “The more you live in someone’s shadow, kid, the longer it takes to cast your own.”

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2023 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts? Follow me on… Twitter @thebookchamber or follow the blog directly.

Want to share this leadership thought with others? Click on one of the social media sharing buttons below and help spread the good…

Truth matters, even when it is attacked…

28 Friday Apr 2023

Posted by in Actions, Honest, Insecurity, Leader, Leadership, Passive-Agressive, Purpose, Time, Truth

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They say, “The truth hurts.” Well, non-truth does also.

For all practical purposes, I believe people care about what is true. Now, you can get caught up in the nuances of the definition of truth, but… Even Pilate asked Jesus, “What is truth?”

What happens when we cannot agree upon what truth is? Do we chalk it up to relativism? People can get stupid when debating “truth.” There lies the problem, people want to debate “truth” to prove a point. I’ve often said, and truly believe, that the truth does not need to be defended. However, it seems that we must do that now. Just listen and watch; it will not take long to see it happening. But to quote Mark Twain, “Never argue with a fool; onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.”

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I joke with my family that if it were not for being disengaged from family and friends, I would be a candidate for being the first to colonize the moon, just to get away from fools and stupid in general. All I need are my books and golf clubs. Used to be that most of the stuff you saw happening, debated, and truth attacked would not even make a difference or would be forgotten five or ten years later. But now, these same happenings, debates, and truth attacks are beginning to have possible long-term effects; some even everlasting.

The definition of truth is now defined as what benefits the person speaking. Any conversation that goes against truth is immediately shut down, ridiculed, or shunned. When those see their “truth” attacked, they become divisive, aggressive, and sometimes passive-aggressive; we can even say violent. Truth becomes irrelevant, people become emotional, and chaos begins to simmer and eventually boil.

Truth will always be attacked. But you know what? Truth is going to win out. As we look forward, truth will continue to stand the test of time. Truth is spoken by honest people who have track records based on, you guessed it, truth. People who speak truth are seen as powerful, which scares many people. Why? Probably due to insecurity. It’s one thing to know the truth and act upon it, yet knowing and not acting on it is where the issues begin.

With light, no amount of darkness can overcome it. The same analogy works with truth; no amount of lies will diminish it. Truth is the constant. There will always be truth attackers and truth bashers. As long as we have people speaking truth, that is enough to give hope for future generations. Have the courage to do so.

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2023 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts? Follow me on… Twitter @thebookchamber or follow the blog directly.

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Leadership and Warning Labels – What is your message?

21 Friday Apr 2023

Posted by in Actions, Attitude, Authentic, Conflict, Consistency, Decisions, Education, Educational Leadership, Influence, Insecurity, Integrity, Kindness, Leader, Leadership, Passive-Agressive, Perception, Perceptions, Sensitive

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When is the last time you read a warning label on a product? Some are quite funny, while others seem plain dumb with the question, “Who would do that anyway?” But nonetheless, they are printed right there on the product (fine print sometimes).

Here are just a few…
A cup of coffee – Caution, content may be hot.
Hairdryer – Do no use while sleeping
Wheelbarrow – Not intended for highway use
Baby Stroller – Remove child before folding
Nyquil – May cause drowsiness

You get the idea. I often wonder who made the particular blunder for that specific warning label?

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Segue to leadership…
It is often said that perception is not reality. But can everybody be wrong? A very good friend of mine says, “Everybody can’t be wrong about the same thing.” Perception becomes a way of understanding or interpreting things. At the same time, reality is the state of things as they actually exist rather than as they may be perceived or might be imagined. That said, what if we had a warning label about us for others to see printed right there on the package, that package being us?

Here might be a few…
Warning:
Do not think on your own – I micromanage
Do not disagree with me – I am moody
Do not cause conflict – I am insecure
Do not outshine me – I am passive-aggressive
Do not have a different opinion – I am highly flammable
Please handle with care – I get my feelings hurt easily
Be a yes person – If you are not, I will find fault
I’m sure you can add to the list…

How refreshing would it be if these warning labels were reversed?
Warning:
Think on your own – I delegate
It’s ok to disagree with me – Does not mean that you are wrong
Sometimes there will be conflict – I will not run from it, and I will support you
Outshine me – The better you are, the better we are
Have a different opinion – I encourage diverse thinking
Please handle with honesty – I will not get my feelings hurt easily
Do not be a yes person – I do not want minions around me

However, I believe the leadership we lead with does carry labels. You might say, “Well, that’s not how I lead,” or “I don’t care what someone else thinks.” But at the same time, we would quickly say that’s not the reputation we want. Well, is everyone wrong, then?

What are you doing to ensure that you have positive leadership labels instead of warning labels? In the end, we are all wearing some type of leadership label. The question is, what does your leadership label say about you?

Go be a great educator and leader today… Our future needs it…

Remember… Think Leadership and Be For Others…

©2023 J Clay Norton

Want more Leadership Thoughts? Follow me on… Twitter @thebookchamber or follow the blog directly.

Want to share this leadership thought with others? Click on one of the social media sharing buttons below and help spread the good…