Let’s Talk About Me… No, Let’s Don’t

20 Friday Oct 2017

Posted by in Attitude, Leader, Leadership, Servant

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Let’s start this week with some lyrics of Toby Keith’s song, “Let’s Talk About Me.”

“But every once in awhile

I want to talk about me

Want to talk about I

Want to talk about number one

Oh my me my

What I think, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I see

I like talking about you, you, you, you usually, but occasionally

I want to talk about me

I want to talk about me“

 

 

While this is a comical song with some hidden truths… There is a great message of leadership within it.

I-wanna-talk-about-me

Let’s Talk About Me…

 

Well, do you know leaders like this? (I can imagine you counting them now.) All a “me leader” wants to talk about is themselves…  How I do this or that… What I have accomplished… What I mean to the organization… What I etc…

You might not agree with this but… there are a lot of selfish leaders out there.  After all, isn’t leadership actually about the leader? Here is what the selfish leader is saying, “Feed me, feed my ego.”

Well, let’s punt all the above and not talk about the “me leader.” Let’s talk about others. Let’s take everything you want recognition for and give it to others.

But you might be thinking, “I do not get to talk about me?” NO! and I am glad you finally figured it out… Let’s turn the conversations around.

Here is the deal… No one wants “you” to be the topic of the conversation when you are the one speaking. If all you have or want to talk about is you, you are sending a powerful message to everyone around. It is a message that is loud and clear.

The hard part of leadership is making it about others. It is not natural for some. True servant-leaders see people as an end instead of a means to an end. It should be what you strive for every day in your leadership.

At the end of the day, it is about other people receiving the glory. Take the spotlight off of you and place it on others. How ironic it is… When you decide to do this, you will end up receiving the recognition you deserve. Let it happen on its own.

We need leaders who are intentional for the right reasons of leadership. One of the right reasons is putting others first and losing the “Let’s Talk About Me” attitude.

Remember… #thinkleadership

 

©2017 J Clay Norton

Follow me on Twitter at TheBookChamber

Subscribe via email to my blog at the top of the page.

 

That Ugly Word… Conflict​

13 Friday Oct 2017

Posted by in Actions, Attitude, Clarity, Conflict, Deciding, Leader, Leadership

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“Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.” – William James

 

Hiding head in sand

Conflict… It is a disease and it is contagious. Run for your lives…

And that is what many leaders do, they run.

Have you ever been around that leader who would not deal with conflict? Or, if they did deal with it, they made the matter worse. Why is this? What is it that they do not understand? As we often say… “The handwriting is on the wall…”

Bottom line… Many leaders avoid conflict. Like it or not, conflict is out there and we have to deal with it. Sometimes sooner rather than later. Either leaders do not like it or they do not want to deal with it. It may be that they want everyone to like them and hope that everyone can just get along. Which begs the question, “Why are some people in a leadership position anyway?”

So what happens when conflict is staring them in the face? Something has to happen, right? Well, here are some thoughts…

They…

Bury It – Put this away somewhere and hope it gets lost and never found. Hope no one remembers where it is. If things go right, they will not even remember where they put it.

Deny It – There is no conflict. What are you talking about?

Diminish It – It is not that big of a deal. You are making way too much out of this.

Drown It – Busy themselves with so much other stuff and not have time to deal with it.

Redirect It – Put the situation on someone else and make it their problem.

In each of these thoughts, the conflict is still there. We live in a fantasy world when we believe the situation will take care of itself. That’s the problem… Someone will dig it back up, refuse to let you be in denial, save it, or direct it back.

A leader’s job is to lead. How we handle conflict shows our leadership. Issues will arise and sometimes conflict hitches a ride. Not dealing with conflict or letting it go unresolved traps and backs us into a corner.

When leaders avoid conflict, they put everyone and everything at risk. They even put themselves at risk. Avoiding conflict causes a ripple effect that turns into tidal waves.

Be a leader who knows how to handle conflict. Everyone around you will appreciate it and you.

Remember… #thinkleadership

©2017 J Clay Norton

Follow me on Twitter at TheBookChamber

Subscribe via email to my blog at the top of the page.

 

 

 

 

How Powerful Is Your SERVE?

06 Friday Oct 2017

Posted by in Attitude, Heart, Inspiration, Leader, Leadership, Servant

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“Leadership is an opportunity to serve. It is not a trumpet to call to self-importance.” – J. Donald Walters

 

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Why do some leaders not serve? Are they too __________… you can fill in the blank.

 

I once heard an adage that stated, “It is very hard to give or receive anything with a closed hand.” That statement can also go for anyone who has a closed heart. A closed heart has got to be one of the saddest things out there. A leader with a closed heart is even worse.

This I believe… Having a closed heart slams the door on you being able to serve.

The amount of influence a leader has is extraordinary. But that influence has both positive and negative measurements. Why do we not understand the value we bring to any situation when we serve? I fear that most leaders today would rather be served than to serve others. Serving has become a lost commodity in leadership.

So… What must we do to make sure we have a powerful SERVE?

Inspire…

Believe it or not, there are people who want you to lead them. When you lead, give others the feeling that makes them believe in themselves.

 

Respect…

Give others the respect you would want yourself. For a true leader, it takes zero effort to be nice and respect others. Let others see you value them and their commitment.

 

Give…

Not only of yourself, but give everything that others will need. Please do not put someone in a situation where they do not have the resources to complete a job.

 

Help…

Help those around you. Do not be that leader who does everything themselves. Convey the knowledge you have and allow others to glean. Help them become successful. The better they look, the better you look.

 

We do not have to go very far to find an opportunity to serve. And when you do have that opportunity, please do not blow your own horn. It does not sound as good as you think it does anyway. Serving is not about you. It is about those who you are serving. In the end, you will make a difference and will have an impact on others.

The powerfulness of your SERVE is about others working hard with you and not for you. This happens when you work hard with and for others. Please notice the difference between the two sentences.

An opportunity to SERVE awaits us all. We just have to have the “want to”…

 

Remember… #thinkleadership

©2017 J Clay Norton

Follow me on Twitter at TheBookChamber

Subscribe via email to my blog at the top of the page.

 

 

“Entitled” Leadership?

29 Friday Sep 2017

Posted by in Actions, Attitude, Clarity, Deciding, Leader, Leadership, Team

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“Leadership is not about a title or a designation. It’s about impact, influence and inspiration. Impact involves getting results, influence is about spreading the passion you have for your work, and you have to inspire team-mates and customers.” – Robin S. Sharma

 

I need a title!

Why?

It makes me look better.

Does it or will it make you lead better?

I don’t know, but it makes me look better!

Screen Shot 2017-09-29 at 8.53.59 AM

 

Let’s start with this fact… and it is a fact: A title does not make you a leader. But oh, how many people live in that fictitious world.

So… Some thoughts about leaders being “entitled”…

Titles are like business cards. Anyone can get one… Make one up and hit print.

Leadership is a melting pot of complex, different attributes. A good leader will rally those around for the good of the group and have their support. But… a true leader will be able to step in when difficult situations occur and make the hard decisions. Given almost any situation, a leader will emerge from within a group. Natural leadership ability will always rise.  The need to self-appoint will not be necessary.

It would be great if titles meant effective leadership ability. But that is not the case. Many leaders with titles cannot or chose not to lead. Either case, sooner or later, failure will happen. When it does, the lack of leadership will show.

Leaders who are “entitled” are blind and have limits to their leadership. Their ego and self-centeredness become known for what they are. “Entitled” leaders take credit for others work, give orders for something they do not want to do, or place blame on others for their own mistakes and failures.

But why are these people in positions to lead? Who knows… the problem is that they are there. It does not take us long to figure out that “entitled” leaders surround us every day. What is worse, they have the power to make decisions that affect a lot of different areas.

But where does a title come in? It doesn’t. Please quit thinking it does.

Some of the best leaders we know do one thing well, they lead. Leadership is a verb, not a noun. It is action. It is the form of doing. Those who lead by title only do so because they have a title.

Anyone and everyone has the capability to be a leader. But leadership is not for everyone and that’s OK. A person chooses leadership when they make a decision for the greater good of a cause and stand for it. They lead by example. They do not ask others to do something they are not willing to do themselves.

.…And most of all, leaders act like leaders even when they do not have a title.

 

Remember… #thinkleadership

©2017 J Clay Norton

Follow me on Twitter at TheBookChamber

Subscribe via email to my blog at the top of the page.